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Showing posts from January, 2010

Quilt Craft

I got this sweet idea for a paper quilt craft from Emperor was a little reluctant to do the craft. He knows cutting things and stringing things are not his strong points. As it is, it took him over two hours to do this project with much help. He worked very hard on it but was motivated to finish as he is a HUGE, HUGE Hello Kitty fan and Mom let him have some of her stationery to decorate the squares. Now, it's hanging in his room and he's very proud of his work.

Hypocrisy is the Human Condition.

If you have the time to watch this video of Gayle Haggard, I think you'll be blessed. She sure sounds a little overidealistic to me, especially in regards to this idea that her husband could go through a couple years of therapy and not have *one* single gay compulsion... but she seems like such an *amazing* person with that kind of compassion for others and forgiveness... wow. Just imagine all the friendships she lost and the pain she went through for that dope of a husband she has. She may be overidealistic, but she does not strike me as naive or stupid. And she is right, I think, in her statement that hypocrisy is the human condition. Her husband has just played his out on a very public stage.Now, of course, ol' Teddy has no thoughts like that at all. No, no, no. But the sad thing is... folks in the church make it kinda tough to come out and say you're struggling in an area like that. I'm not saying it's "right," but we also have plenty of fat p…

I Choose YOU!

*** ** ***
*** ** *** **** ** *** ** *** ** *** ** *** ** *** ** *** *** *** *** * ** * **** * * ** ** * * Wow, we have a phrase! Um, not that it's very useful unless you happen to have a Poke-ball and are starring on a TV show... but we have a phrase. Note the imaginary Poke-ball being thrown. I can now say without hesitation that ALL my boys are now obsessed with Pokemon. Still haven't heard "Mama" from the kid yet, but I guess he has his own priorities. :)

The Lunch Line

My wrist was sprained yesterday afternoon, necessitating a trip to the emergency room. I'm on drugs, so that precludes our planned trip to the store today. The boys were disappointed as it is Rose's birthday, and they wanted to pick out the cake mix themselves. Sorry. Mom just bought chocolate and hopes you're ok with it. Elf wondered if we couldn't just have a store in our house just like the school (Elf, that is called a "cafeteria."). So here it is. We wait on line until the cafeteria bell rings (yay for timers!) We must enter our student number (Elf is 1, Emperor is 2. I'm original that way.). Then we must tally our meal cost and show the old cafeteria lady aka "Mom" what our beloved parents will be paying into the account. At one time, Emperor had racked up $317 and some change in charges. The lunch lady always appreciates "tips," but unfortunately, she also is in charge of teaching you the difference between the "cent" …

Lookit This Picture, Mom!!

Elf waves me over to see a photo of two scorpions looking like they're holding hands.

"You have to hear this," he tells me, and settles in to read. "When scorpions reproduce, the male uses his pincers to hold the female's pincers. Then he drags her around until he can fertilize her."

Here Patrick, who was standing nearby, has to smirk and raise his eyebrow at me. Shut up, Patrick.

"When scorpions do this, it looks like they are dancing," Elf read.

"Um, yeah, it does kinda look like they are dancing, I guess," I told him as I tried to do the "look like I'm really busy and in too much of a hurry to talk right now" thing because I am uncomfortable. Mostly because I just faintly heard Patrick snort.

"Sometimes getting dragged around makes the female angry," Elf continued. Man, that kid CANNOT take a hint. Now Patrick is devoting his full attention to this reading. He's nodding and his arms are folded. My heart…

Feeling Discouraged.

Sorry, but yes, I get there sometimes. I've been reading your blog.

I'm glad for you that you have 16 children, all homeschooled, and all perfectly neat and tidy in the pictures (matching outfits, too. How did you afford that? And then, what threats did you have to use on your teen male to get him all dressed up like that?). I admit that I'm glad mostly because then I could at least point to someone else who has it all together and say, well... it isn't the "lots of kids" or the "homeschooling" that makes us dysfunctional and odd... it's just us. That's oddly comforting, because if the problem is us, all we have to do is pray reallllly hard while clicking our special red shoes and reading the correct Bible verse, and we will *change* and become different sorts of people. Nice ones, even.

I must admit to you at the present moment that I'm continually tweaking the schedule here at the Mrs. C house. I'm so tiiiired of trying to ho…

Eating School Lunches

Interesting little public school lunch blog here. (I don't think the lunches blogged so far seem very terrible!) Pictured are our lunches today. It's pretty much the same every day except Tuesdays, when we cook. Tuesdays are often our days to get adventurous. Note that Woodjie has a different lunch than the other children. He has a pretty limited selection of food he enjoys. When I'm out of the house, I'm always looking for something new (milk and egg-free) that might be palatable to him.


Apparently, Elf doesn't like hair in his face... so he cut it himself. It was down to the scalp in a few places, which precluded my cutting it with scissors. Buzz cut time. Then G (who refuses to get a hair cut!) came home with bloody skulls drawn all over his hands. Yep. We're realll fashion winners here at the Mrs. C house. :( I think I did a pretty good job considering, though.

A Keebler Elf in My Kitchen.

Elf is learning to help with sweeping and he enjoys home ec on Tuesdays with his brother. We decorated aprons once in art and Elf wrote "Kiss the Cook" on his... because he saw it on Spongebob. He deeply regrets this action as Mother takes the saying rather seriously. At least he is learning this lesson now, unlike the poor teens I've seen prancing about with glittery sayings like "Hot Strumpet" pasted on their derrieres. "Kiss the Cook" is way cooler. I'm hoping to give the boys a *great* grade on the cookies they are making. :)

Guest Post.

"It says a lot about my fellow Americans when an article about a massive tragic event becomes fodder for political bashing, classism, and racism, as well as attempts at humor. And so many wonder why we have developed an image of imperial arrogance around the world.Compassion and community are foreign concepts to many Americans. We have developed into a nation of greedy, self-centered nationalists, and then complain when the rest of the world resists anything we say or do.

"This tragedy was about people: Many thousands of people are dead or injured. Babies buried under rubble. Old men crushed under rock and cement. Old women suffocated under tons of dirt. Children who probably had played games like any other children in the world crushed to death. Men and women who were mothers and fathers lost forever. Those who lived have to dig all those who died out. They must live knowing that those they loved dearly died unexpectedly and possibly painfully.

"Please stop commenting on…


Can you imagine NOT choosing your homeschool textbooks? That you were so big and important the textbook people gave you footrubs and free lunches as you sat in a puffy reclining chair? That they swooned and said, "Yes, Ma'am! That'll be in there!" to you as you rattled off all the stuff you wanted included in the next book you bought? (The imagining is a bit weirder if you are a male reader, but I digress.)

Well, let's just pretend you and a few of your friends are elected on a big important board. You guys get together and decide what the books that aren't even published yet are going to include. The books will sell millions of copies and be diligently taught to children not only in your little homeschool group... but nationwide. Because (let's pretend) ALL the schools in the nation tend to follow your lead. You're the respected curriculum choice... because everyone chooses your stuff... because you have a lot of people in your group... so eve…

What We're Learning

Honest to goodness, we really need some "life skills" around this place. Emperor and Elf are learning to clean the kitchen after breakfast. We have cereal for breakfast, so this is the easiest cleanup of the day, and one I can let slide a little until their skills improve. In other news, Emperor is learning not to run up and kiss other people's babies when we're out. For a while, the "ask first" thing worked a bit... but then he got older and even though he remembers to ask more frequently, folks get more skittish about it now. He's just under five feet tall and wears a men's size 8 in shoes, and most people don't like almost-grown people smooching on their babies, even if they are only eight years old and tell you their life story while they are doing it. I keep telling him "space bubble," and demonstrating an arm's length distance. Ok, at least he's not sniffing people and going "mum-mum-mum" on surprised stra…

The Class Ring

Patrick and I looked at until late Thursday night. Some of these designs are very unique. Patrick played around with all kinds of different styles and finally decided on a beaut for about $300. He would get the "gamer" style on one side (it pictures what is OBVIOUSLY a Nintendo DS) and a dragon on the other. The system pictured would be dated in a few years, but it's the memories that count.

Did you know Jostens also sells THREE Barack Obama styles?? I kid you not.

Barack Obama high school rings?? No Washington or (my fave!) John Quincy Adams rings?? Man, Jesus doesn't even have His own style with Jostens, but Obama gets three gaudy styles - your choice of custom colour, some complete with the American flag.

Patrick thought and thought and thought about it, but finally decided that he would appreciate a ring, but didn't think he'd appreciate it $300 worth. Which is probably a wise decision as aside from a mood ring we got at the Fall Festival …

Fun Food Days!

Rose wants some cheese balls. "Ball?" she asks. Ok. "Hee," she'll point into her bowl. As in, "Put 'em right here." Ok, Miss Bossy. There ya go.

"EE? EEE? EEEE!" Woodjie is no dum-dum. Hey, he doesn't say much, but he knows a good thing when he sees it. For him, though, it isn't really a good thing because he has allergies. He knows maybe three words, and unfortunately he chose to say a new one when we were serving something he couldn't have recently: pizza.

"No, Woodjie. You're allergic." Before the wail and tantrum that are starting to simmer after his hearing this reach full boil, I bring over the milk and egg-free sugar wafers. "Want cookie?"

"Doo-EEE?" (Whole body nod!) Oh, yeah. He's pretty happy now. But there's still trouble in the Mrs. C house.

"Boo? Boo? Boo?" Rose wants 'em. She even points to the spot in her bowl she wants you to set them. &qu…

Rite of Passage.

Patrick has never owned a gold or silver piece of jewelry. Frankly, I was surprised at his interest in class rings, most particularly as he will not be attending his current high school next year. Presently he attends Cityname High School, and next year he will attend the *new* Cityname NORTH High School (Yes, they had several committees and spent much time and effort reviewing submissions so that they could name this school properly.) If it's been awhile since you've been in high school, or you're just plain curious, you'll want to design your dream ring at and take a look at their stuff. Patrick is very adamant about owning a class ring... despite the fact that they will not make one with the new high school logo... he'll have to have it CHANGED next year. D says mayyyybe he'll contribute $40 toward the ring, but Patrick has to work for the rest. If I grumble about it, he'll make it $30. :P

All About Girlie.

When I was expecting, I was EXPECTING I'd have this sweet little Girlie with hair bows. She would dress nicely and sit quietly. Sugar and spice and everything nice. Awww.

But she doesn't. She laughs at burps. She puts her feet on the table during meals. She even throws her food, she's that rude sometimes. It doesn't help that occasionally her brothers encourage this by giggling about it.

I'm really working hard with this kid. At least now she can wave her hand around as though she were smelling something awful and say "poo-poo" so I can get a chance to change her. Before? She'd crumple her nose as if to say, "Get this icky thing away from me," dig in her pants and throw the offending object away. Eew!

Ok, so there's progress on that front. But she's still climbing the couch. It doesn't matter what nasty punishment I devise for the kid; she's motivated. Once I caught her in the act and was running toward her when sh…


Woodjie likes to ask for an "ooo" now. Once he has a spoon, you know a request for "eee" is not too far behind. I mean, you need an "ooo" to eat your "eee." Though sometimes he's had to make do with eating cereal with his "ooo" because Mom doesn't understand requests for "eee" first thing in the morning. Sorry. Not to mention that Mom is going to run out of "eee" soon at the rate we're going.

Watching Pride and Prejudice. Again.

This is what is starting to happen during the ballroom dancing scenes... Awww...

Tax Deductions for Disposable Kids?

Synopsis of article:

Waah! We were only able to have one child, and we wanted another boy about the same age as ours for his company, figuring it would be better than springing for a dog that would wet on the floor and bark at night. What better way to get a kid than to ask the government for one of the extras they have on hand already? Then we could train him up, raise him right (you know, as though he came biologically from a *decent* family like ours?) and get a tax deduction to boot!

Yippeee! Now we won't have to be sad that we can only have one kid and/or I won't have to worry about gaining weight and being a fat pig... like the kid's biological mother.

Can I just go off on the kid's biological mother a sec? Ok, thanks. Um, she's a selfish little twit who doesn't have custody. I'm going to disclose private information about her problems for public consumption in this article because I'm mad about taxes and stuff. I'm also going to write a…

Homeschool Update


Elf and Emperor have been reviewing subjects and predicates, using a thesaurus, and writing a "personal narrative" of late. Don't forget to comment on their blogs if you haven't already! They are also in the process of writing about what they think would happen if they were in charge of writing a sequel to Journey to the Center of the Earth. I'm NOT allowed to view the authors' works in progress, but they've been pretty busy. We're learning to write the names of the books of the Bible correctly this year as part of our spelling curriculum. A few other words Elf has trouble with are included each week. Elf is a great reader, so whoever came up with this idea that great readers are always great spellers... is wrong. Elf is a great speller "in progress," ok?


We will continue working on long division and multiplication until we've mastered it. Even if it takes until June. And even if using a calculator is easier. The noo…

Blanket Homeschooling!

Yep. It's a new one. Public schools are closed today due to the cold weather. It's really too cold to expect small children to wait at the bus stop or walk to school. It doesn't stop us from grabbing a blanket and getting our work done, though. See how snuzzly warm Elf is in his blanket? I also paid Patrick $5 to teach the boys some music for an hour. At the end of the lesson, Elf and Emperor could read the notes you see here. Patrick is sad that he didn't have time to teach them "tempo" and a bunch of other stuff. Maybe some other cold day. :)

Religious Stuff on the 'Net.

I'm Jewish! Who knew?? LOL Well, these are my results from a the Belief-O-Matic quiz:

Orthodox Judaism: 100%
Eastern Orthodox: 93%
Roman Catholic: 93%
Seventh Day Adventist: 92%
Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant: 91%

Hat tip to Darren for the quiz link. I'm sure it's scientifically accurate, though I'm thinking my refusal to plop God into a "Trinity" category is what caused this shift between what I identify myself as... and what the quiz figures I am. So I guess I can't join your church if absolute ready-to-die for the concept of Trinity is a membership requirement. Conversely, am I going to say that what was contained in the bodily Jesus is all there is to God? He was just playing cosmic puppet show when He got baptized? Maybe Mrs. C is wishy-washy, or she just realizes she doesn't have all the answers, or she is too lazy to fast for 27 days and pray until God reveals the answer. (Maybe I just don't wanna know that bad and am …


We wrote personal narratives recently in our homeschool. Would you like to read them?

Emperor wrote about going to the zoo last summer. We had a long day at the zoo before we came home to play outside and have dinner. I've left all of his original spelling and punctuation, but have altered some of the names mentioned to blog nicknames. :)

Elf has written an account about flying to Florida and going to Disney with his Nana and Grandpa about three years ago. I am not sure where he gets his ideas that Nana and Grandpa own the Disney hotel or how he flew for days and days, but it's pretty cute as well.

Will you please visit and feed the comment bugs? Thanks!

The *NEW* Room!

Before, we had a blue sky with clouds and little boys' names embellished in red balloon-y letters. But even Elfie McMelfie was ready for a change, for something new and different. Elf and Emperor decided on Arabian Sands paint from Home Depot, and we planned on painting the room and then doodling Western "brands" on the wall like wallpaper. It took me a lonnnnng time to finish, and I was pretty sore. Even D, who hates working 'round the house, touched up a few corners for me out of mercy, or just wanting it all to be over already... I hung a bulletin board for the boys' finished bead projects. When we finished and popped the beds back into place, we took a look. The boys and I (well, Woodjie, who shares this room, didn't really get any say) agreed that it would look a bit too "busy" with brands all over, so we picked out some pictures from our Picturing America packet. Elf has chosen photo of a stained glass autumn treescape, and Emperor chose The M…