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This is What Public School Did to My Child

On several occasions, six-year-old Elf was dragged into a small room not unlike the one pictured. Frequently he was locked inside for his "poor choices" because the staff did not know what to do with him. At first, the special ed "experts" were able to convince me that a brief time alone would help him calm down and rejoin his class. But guess what? It didn't cure him of his autism and in fact made things much worse. So when an "expert" at your local school does something to your child you just feel is WRONG, don't go along with it. They don't want to treat your child with dignity or give him any help he needs if it COSTS them money or staff time.

This is what we have to fight here in Missouri.

My older autistic son G still attends public school and yes, they still do use "safe rooms" there. I'm actually OK with it so long as the door is NOT shut and locked. Having a place to retreat when you're overwhelmed is a good thing. Being locked in a closet, no matter what fancy name you call it, is NOT. It is CHILD ABUSE in my opinion. Unfortunately, the law is specifically written so that the school staff can beat your child and lock him in a closet and DFS does NOT have authority over the situation unless the superintendent thinks it's a problem. Hmm. No conflict of interest there, is there? Naw.

"Upon receipt of any reports of child abuse by the division of family services pursuant to sections 210.110 to 210.165, RSMo, which allegedly involves personnel of a school district, the division of family services shall notify the superintendent of schools of the district..."

You blew the whistle and asked for help. The Division of Family Services will help, right? Aren't they there to protect the children? Why are they talking to the superintendent instead of launching their own investigation? Why is the law betraying the citizens of this state?

"If, after an initial investigation, the superintendent of schools or the president of the school board finds that the report involves an alleged incident of child abuse other than the administration of a spanking or the use of force to protect persons or property by [certificated] school personnel pursuant to a written policy of discipline or [a] that the report was made for the sole purpose of harassing a public school employee, the superintendent of schools or the president of the school board shall immediately refer the matter back to the children's division [of family services] and take no further action. In all matters referred back to the children's division [of family services], the division [of family services] shall treat the report in the same manner as other reports of alleged child abuse received by the division. If the report pertains to an alleged incident which arose out of or is related to a spanking or the use of force to protect persons or property administered by [certificated] personnel of a school district pursuant to a written policy of discipline or a report made for the sole purpose of harassing a public school employee, a notification of the reported child abuse shall be sent by the superintendent of schools or the president of the school board to the juvenile officer of the county in which the alleged incident occurred."

In other words, the school abused your child and you reported it? Oh, the superintendent gets to decide if it's abuse. If he feels like admitting it's abuse (and you know they get paid extra if they do, right???), the report goes to the Division of Family Services and they treat it just like any other abuse investigation. (HA!) Then you and your children are reported to the authorities for making their lives hard.

Don't believe me? Read it. Thankfully our legislators are working hard so that "false reporting" and the like doesn't happen. So just shut up about your kid getting abused. The administration has the right to smack your kid around explicitly detailed in the law (read it!) and you are one wacko parent opposed to "discipline in the schools" if you speak out against it.

I'm speaking out.


  1. I am SPEECHLESS!!! they can DO THAT to your children in America!!! Over here in New Zealand NO ONE is allowed (by law) to smack a child, even the parents!!! I am horrified to think teachers can hit kids over there, let alone lock them in a closet!!!! SPEECHLESS.

  2. morningStar
    Here the schools have *time out* rooms but the teachers aren't allowed to lock (or even close) the doors & I've never seen one that small. They are regular, albiet empty, rooms.

    Quite some time ago (so no way can I remember my source) I read an experiment that showed that overcrowding & multi storied living (as in flats) produced higher levels of violence & I have since never understood the drive for large *super schools* Wouldn't common sense tell you smaller is better? Obviously common sense is a casuality of the public school system.

  3. I have nothing good to say about public schools, either when I went to them or when some of my children attended. The good teachers are few and far between and don't make up for the terrible damage inflicted by the borderline nut-cases. The institution is only for warehousing children to turn them into good little citizens.

    My brother wore a sign around his neck that said BABY on the playground. Inside, his desk was put next to teacher so she could hit him with a yard stick every time his attention wandered.

    The principle hit me with a paddle thirteen times (I counted) for defending myself from a gang of much bigger girls.

    My catalog of abuses from public schools is very long.

    Each of my children, at least the ones who attended PS, has similar terrible stories to tell.

  4. I am telling you right now that you use your lungs and not only speak out what you are wanting to speak out about but SCREAM It out too. I can't believe that they think this is something that they are doing right in a school. I feel sorry for your poor munchkin. To think he's only 6 and he has already dealt with so much in his life school wise. I'm glad he enjoys you homeschooling him. It makes me happy that he's home with you.

    P.S. I knew it was you on my blog. You are the only one who posts anonymous anyway.


    Aunt B.

  5. Corporal punishment in schools has been against the law here for a while now. I cant exactly remember when the legislation was passed..

    I would be absolutely horrified, then furious if my child was locked in a closet.

    Is elf ok now?

    xxx Kim

  6. Thanks for the comment. You know I'll be talking... loudly. I've made several trips to Jeff City over the past two years and to my district reps' home offices. If you are interested in sharing your story, please e-mail your info to I can give you some information to help show that this is a problem in MO. Sorry, I am purposely being vague.

  7. There was something similar that happened at my children's former school here in Lee's Summit--Underwood. I'm not recalling the details, but it wasn't good.

    AND thank you my dear friend, your kindness definitely helped. Pray for us please. xoxo

  8. Holy cow! I can't believe that's legal. I'm going have to talk my daughter tomorrow to see what happends to bad kids at school.

  9. Man I don't know what I would do if I found my child locked in that. I am so sorry that this happened.

  10. You know, you here about public school teachers being wishy washy and feelings-based and ultra liberal (maybe that's more a problem here on the west coast) but I guess this stuff goes on too. I can attest that when I was in kindergarten (mid 1980's) I had a teacher who liked to try to yank my arm out of it's socket when I was bad. I was confused and afraid to tell anyone that it bothered me.

  11. wow...another case for homeschooling...

  12. In other words, the legislation is so broad it allows them to do exactly as they wish and you (we) don't have a leg to stand on! Way to treat children with respect and teach them to trust adults! NOT.

  13. How barbaric! I'm not really a fan of home-school myself, but, as an American, I am glad that we have the option to home-school, because many children need to be saved from harsh, inhumane treatment such as that which your son received, or for other reasons, such as to escape bullying, a poor education, or an anti-Christian agenda. I am thankful that the schools where I live are rural, locally controlled and taught by people who are our friends and neighbors, and still permit Christian things like vocal prayers over your lunch, Christian T-shirts, Christmas carols sung at Christmas plays, Christian movies (my son's history teacher showed Ben Hur once during class), etc. But not everyone is so blessed. I am glad that you were able to remove your child from this awful situation and hope that the home-schooling works out well.

  14. Mrs. C., I appreciate reading your comments on the In the Trenches of Public Education blog. That's what led me to this blog.
    That's horrible about what happened to your child in school. My grandchildren are being homeschooled and I'm so glad.
    Before I retired, I taught in a public school. I was a good teacher, but the circumstances were horrible. I ended up leaving and wrote about my experiences, the joys of teaching, and the obstacles I fought. It was pretty unbelievable.
    Bless you, and keep on bloggin'!

  15. WOw, I would have lost it !! That is so sad. I homeschooled mine because of asthma in the beginning. The school itself was making my child ill.

  16. I hadn't realized that Elf went to public school, I thought you had homeschooled him all along.

    What a sad and sickening world we live in when it's okay for those who are supposed to help educate our children are also the ones allowed to teach them firsthand what abuse is. :(

  17. I am from Blondee's blog today - amen sister. We just had a bullying incident with my grandson. They pulled him in after we reported it - and raked him over the coals and got him in tears. He was called gay - gayfer and we reported it. It was in a game and we didn't know that part - so when they called him in and they harassed him so bad -
    So lesson here - if someone calls your child a name - it is not abuse if it is said in a game way.
    What really is the lesson - it is easier to get on the victim then the bully - takes more work to get on the bully. Grandson - SPD and ADHD


    1. "Principal Smith, you are one jumped-up, power-hungry Nazi toad-boy who likes to lick feet.

      Hey! I was just kidding! It was an insult game I just made up!!"

      Ok, that is disrespectful. And rude! And I would never say that! So WHY is it OK when kids treat each other that way and aren't taught any better??

      I don't doubt things like this happen all the time. The problem is when these people get so bogged down taking away the plastic knives that they can't deal with it. :(

      Another thing I've noticed is that "standard-issue" kids tend to taunt our children in such a way that they get a rise out of them. Our kids react and then guess who gets into trouble?


    2. PS I forgot to say: WELCOME! I just got so riled there for a sec that I forgot my good manners... :)


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