27 December 2010

Vent Post...

Dear Vulturelike Armed Forces Representatives,

I can understand why you might want to get your dirty claws on Patrick and make him sign papers so that you can snatch him away from his parents. He is in excellent physical condition, can take orders well, and hasn't learnt how to cause trouble.

But Patrick is SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD. He is a child. You cannot have him. Go to hell.

It's true that I usually treat him like an adult, but I'm going to make an exception in this case. He won't get your mail. You will not have access to him on MY telephone, so quit calling. I'd feel safer with a Sexxy Teacher Pedophile (as featured on Foxx News with "too pretty for jail" picture!) giving extra credit tutoring lessons in a bikini than have him be in regular contact with any sort of recruitment office. You've gotta be kidding.

And shame on the school for giving out his contact information. I can't imagine where else they would get it unless they are cross-referencing the census data they promise-swore never to touch...

Shame on you recruiting officers. You can't even wait until these CHILDREN are legal adults before you want to "interest" them in a career that could well involve their dying in some pointless war so you can fulfil some stupid freaking recruiting quotas??

You will not get my child!


Patrick's Mom

PS. I hope that you can take my subtly worded hints and never contact my kid again. I might not be so nice next time. Thank youuuu.


  1. Hey, Mrs. C! What's up? Are they taking away your son? They're taking him to the army? WOW! That's so coool!

    . . .

    Oh, I know you don't like the idea. I'm sorry for being so enthusiastic. =|

    I am in a good mood, and I want to put you in a good mood: well, I have good news! I awarded you as one of the nine blogs in my Hall of Fame. Basically that means your blog is one of my favorite blogs, and that I really like you as a person.

    Smile! =]

  2. i liked it when you said, "Go to hell" cuz thats how i would feel. haha, but seriously, how else would they be able to contact you? I would get ugly too. This war is, like you said, stupid. So i like the vent letter :)

    PS. Ya, I usually dont stay up this late but i got a new wii game and lost track of time ...

  3. I am with you on this one. When I learned that the military had access to my kids through the school and I had no say in it, I was (still am) furious. How dare they attempt to go around me? I have told the boys that if they don't wish to take the ASVAB I will make it my business to make sure that they don't have to. So far they've opted to take it and purposefully scuttle the score by answering at random.

    First the army came for Jeremiah--calling every day and hanging up on the machine. Even after Gary (who is former military himself) answered and told them he was going to college. Then Jeremiah told them the same thing himself and they still didn't quit. Finally, Gary answered, told them that he'd moved out (he hadn't), and that he'd joined the Air Force. That ended the phone calls.

    Then they came for Daniel and those phone calls haven't been as frequent (which is funny as his scuttled ASVAB was significantly higher). Why? Daniel met up with a recruiter and told the guy how much he liked to play with fire (I kid you not). The boy can't lie to save his life, but he is a great actor when it suits his purposes and I guess this combined with Daniel's somewhat wooden Aspy demeanor, unnerved the recruiter. This tells me a lot about how much information they have on our boys and how much they're passing around and it bothers me.

    It is one thing to send them information in the mail during their senior year. It is quite another to attempt to meet with them at school and call my house constantly after politely being put off by a parent. We would be proud if our boys wanted to serve (Gary is a former Marine and is an Army brat himself), but we want them to make the decision on their own without pressure.

  4. With this new adminstration, enlistment numbers are way down. They are getting desperate because rarely is anyone walking in and volunteering these days.

    I don't think the cause is pointless, but the efforts are because the military isn't allowed to be the military. This could have been done long ago if they were allowed to operate as a military should.

    I wouldn't want my kid serving right now either, but if any of them wanted to I would support them with gritted teeth.

    I hope your message was loud and clear.

  5. Dude. I CANNOT believe that some groups are trying to keep military recruitment of college campuses, but that the harassment of high schoolers is okay. Seriously, that is just shocking. Not to mention, it seems like a HUGE violation of his privacy.

  6. I agree that recruitment of high school kids is way out of line!!!

  7. Disgruntled Elf Mom- Check with your districts guidance counselor. Here in NY they fleece out the names of children to the recruiters who may not be 'college material' or who might need some 'growing up'first.Some 'guidance', eh?

    I agree, they shouldn't be allowed to call a minor. In my opinion it's harassment.


Non-troll comments always welcome! :)