I've been working very hard for about a year and a half on losing weight and it is more than a little slow. The math just doesn't seem to work out, and I'm not losing nearly what I ought because by the numbers? I should have really been much thinner by now. I have little energy. You know. Fat, lazy slob. Not to be melodramatic, but I hate my life, or at least most of it.
It's really bugged me for a while and I've tried to work at being a better person and all that. Changing my attitude about things and so on. It just doesn't happen. I still feel all slovenly and I really don't care that I'm wearing sweatpants, thanks. Even brushing my hair seems like too much work. Like there is no point even trying to lose weight any more, everything is against me, "fat" is just part of who I am in a way I can't express. I sort of live like a snail.
It just doesn't matter.
Recently I went to the doctor because Woodjie eloped again and I about died trying to catch him. I'm just so out of shape. So he ran a bunch of tests. Apparently I have something called "hypothyroidism" and what it does? Is turn you into a fat, lazy slob.
And there are pills for it! And in a few months, when they knock up my meds a notch or two, I should start to feel better! Yay! I took my first low-level dose of Synthroid today. I am happy to have a name for this and some hope that at the very least, it's not my personality. *whew*
I told my dad about it and he's all, oh yeah, that's what my mom and Aunt Dot had. Well, wonderful. What else do you think I might die from that's hereditary?
And he sent me a list.
Thanks, Dad! :)