Bad Homeschooling

Don't ya hate when it seems everyone assumes you must be doing a bad job homeschooling? Doesn't that feel discouraging to you? What do you do about it?

Do you pull out extensive testing records right there at the old Hy-Vee? Do you state that Joey is just like all his homeschooling peers in that he outscores all those ragamuffin, riff-raff, scum-of-the-earth children whose parents don't care enough to homeschool 'em?

(Hey! Guess what Elf said a bit ago? He said he was glad he didn't go to public school because that's where all the "rough and tough" kids go. You know, like his big brothers. Um, and where *he* used to go. And Patrick says our homeschooling is really, really old-fashioned, I think *just* because we use McGuffey Readers. We also use the latest copy of Ranger Rick and stuff on the internet, but I guess that part doesn't count because it doesn't back his little thesis. So, maybe I should be more understanding of these stereotypes because I live with them. Anyway, back to my post...)

Or is the testing irrelevant because you're too busy getting ten-year-old Joey off to his college class downtown than to worry about petty stuff like that? (Not linking to those parents. Thanks for reading.)

Or do you take a different tack... do you tell 'em it's none of their business and they can go jump in a lake? Are you hostile to people who get that little "tone" with you?

Or do you evangelize the grandparents with the good news of homeschooling? It's great stuff, folks! Hey, if grandpa has an open enough mind that he can sit down and read your children's schoolbooks out of interest in what they're learning, that's wonderful. I don't know too many grandparents like that.

Usually when they arrive, grandparents are too busy passing out the new toys they bought on the way over to be looking at books. Then the children get all hyper with their new gadgets and run all over the place. They act inappropriately and jump all over everything and everybody. Wheeee! Then old Nana and Grandpa are suddenly tired! They go back to their hotel room where they can smoke in peace, and say that they had a really nice visit and see ya in a few years as they head out the door. I can't be the only one...

And when you HAVE to talk to the bad guys at the state about your school, do you do the minimum reporting possible? Or do you tell about all the extra things you've been doing and include spectacular 20-page reports written by the children about their "field trips" to Australia, the fluent German and French they speak and the Social Studies classes they attend at the snooty expensive co-op? Do you accidentally on purpose stuff in some of the post-graduate math worksheets your six-year-old is working on, just to show what he could do? Dork. Quit it! You raise the bar too high for the rest of us.

Seriously, though, it seems that homeschoolers in the news are either abused little kids who have never seen sunlight, or they're super Little Professors that began college around age four, but had a little trouble with their afternoon classes because of "nap conflict."

Why can't we just be regular people? You know the kind. The ones who seem really smart one minute, but the next have forgotten all their times tables and which continent they are currently residing in. The regular kid kind of regular people. Well, that's what my children are.