Thrift Store Finds.

D and I have been leaving children alone with Patrick and just going to thrift stores for fun a couple times a week. It gives Patrick a little extra money and it gives us a chance to *leave.* Everybody wins! Well, except G. G has been forced to come along on these incredibly boring excusions because we're jerks and unfair. The plus is that he can play his DS in the van to his heart's content, or he can come in and look around while we spend "hours and hours" looking at stuff.

I really should bring my camera on one of these outings. You wouldn't believe the stuff they're selling... which means you wouldn't believe the stuff people used to have in their homes until recently... Would you dress a four-year-old in a shirt with the words, "In your dreams..." on it? I might've if it had cute bears sleeping near puffy clouds or something, and not thought about the innuendo. But the glamour chick pictured on the T, complete with cleavage, and the shirt being one of those lace-up numbers... Well... What kinda sicko has "dreams" about a little kid??? I couldn't even see my way clear to donating such a thing if I received it as a gift for my child.

One really GREAT thing I found on my last trip was a pair of basketball shoes for G! Nikes, too. The pair we got seems to be an older version of this, because they don't sell the same kind any more. Product review also seems consistent, as the shoes are very heavy. I couldn't imagine running in them, but G was thrilled. They seem to be a bit more stylish than the stuff we usually buy for him at Kohl's or Wal-Mart. :] That was an outrageous $7.96, considering it's a thrift store. But ok. How often do you find really nice size 13s in decent colours and condition? So... there you go.

We also bought a pie plate that has a blueberry pie recipe and picture on it. D was surprised I spent a whole $3.48 on it. Yeah... that's not like me to spend that much. But I had been hoping to find something for pies for a long time. This is decorative, but you can bake in it as well. We made strawberry apple pie the next day in it (one can strawberry filling, mixed with one can apple). Emperor made a bit of a fuss about using the pie pan. "We're not making a blueberry pie!" he objected.

LOL. Emperor is not the most logical guy on the planet. He got Elf hesitant to use the pan as well. D came into the room later and said, "Why are you making that? That's not a blueberry pie!" Um... thanks a lot. Emperor talked to you, didn't he? No... and D also thinks that Emperor's objections to using the pie pan are perfectly logical.

Ah, well. The pie pan baked beautifully. Not a bit of pie burnt on the bottom or sides, but fully cooked. Who would get rid of a pie pan? Doesn't everyone use these almost weekly?

Naboth's Vineyard Part I

Who Speaks For Autistic People?

My mind goes round and round on this one. The medical professionals, who by and large are NOT disabled themselves, get to cobble together the DSM that spells out which problems are considered conditions and which are not. And it bothers me that it's starting to look as though Asperger's is going to be eliminated from the next edition.

Call me paranoid, but what if we just eliminated all the well-adjusted and verbal schizophrenics or dyslexics from their little DSM categories and left ONLY the ones who couldn't advocate for themselves or others? What kind of advocacy would the "real" disabled people be able to cobble together? You see where I'm going with this.

Now, I *totally* and completely get this idea that one person might not be "as disabled" as another. Or that maybe the person on the more functional end of the spectrum oughtn't qualify for aid when dollars are tight and we need to concentrate on those who are more severely affected. But the truth is that being autistic does not HAVE to mean life in an institution. It can. It doesn't HAVE to mean being "disconnected" from others. It can.

But you see, not only are we dealing with disability, we're also dealing with personality mixed in with the disability. Doctors and others, in diagnosing, have to tease out how one may affect the other in deciding who gets what label. And hey! I get that autistic folks generally may be more introverted as a group and that there's a fine line between "introverted and weird" and "disabled."

I have several children who manifest their disabilities in different ways. I would LIKE funding for my oldest autistic child who is unable to keep his thoughts to himself and/or can lose his temper royally. It's so way far beyond the "just teach the child to mind" category that it isn't even fair to comment upon. Suffice to say we are doing all we can. This child, without special help, will likely bounce from one low-paying job to another and have difficulty with his relationships. Even with special help, he's got some troubles. I'm truly sorry. I'm doing all I can for him. But eliminate the PDDs from the DSMs and we have a MESs.

Elfie McMelfie will likely just need a bit of sheltering. Please, no jury duty, as just the very thought that someone else isn't a Christian is enough to shock him to tears. The eternal Hell that awaits them is too frightening! (IMO that doesn't make for an impartial juror. I love him, and it's nice that he cares about people so deeply... and maybe more of us should... but just saying.) Please, no big crowds. No rock concerts. No putting any book on top of the Bible. Even anther Bible, unless it's the King James Version with no typos in it. You've been warned. Elf should be ok if people understand his quirks and let him work with a small group of folks doing the same thing each day. He will be ok with just a bit of understanding; he really will.

But Woodjie. Poor little guy needs LOTS of help! This fellow is leading me down a path I have never travelled. I am not sure how to help him. I do know he needs lots of help to succeed. I know he would probably want other autistic people who know a bit better about what life is like for him to speak for him rather than a doctor who sees him for 15 minutes. For that matter, I know that little fellow well and would be the very best advocate I can be for him... but I'm still Mommy. Still see him with the Mommy heart. Certainly if other people with the "autistic" label are advocating for autistics in general, it would be better for Woodjie.

Then again, too bad we have to have labels. Too bad we can't have a number and say well, Woodjie's life skills are at a 10 out of 100 (100 being typical three-year-old, going potty but needing help with snaps sort of thing). Then we could more closely advocate between labelled groups. Certainly my child has things in common with a Downs Syndrome child, and things NOT in common. But yet we seem to rally people in our own organizations without looking to the commonalities between conditions.

Where am I going with this? I don't know. Just wanted to chat with you today about the fact that having the more "functional" people losing the label soon probably will not bode well for those remaining. Probably it will reinforce stereotypes about autistic people as well.

If you have any thoughts on this, I'd like to hear them unless your surname happens to be "Savage."

Japan

Please read Emperor and Elf's blogs about Japan. Don't forget to feed the comment nuts!

They were given a stack of children's books last week and just told to go learn about it. Sometimes I'm crazy like that. It's interesting sometimes the things they pick up. Notice that World War II is not mentioned. I went back and looked at the kids' books and... it really isn't covered AT ALL.

I'm going to have to clue them in about that, but it was a rather messy and horrible end to a war. And yet it had to end. I know it's a rather sorrowful subject, but I would *think* that it would at least bear a mentioning in a book about Japan. My children were left with the impression that there were still plenty of Samurai and they'd like to see one.

Sometimes.

Sometimes I don't think I'm raising my older sons with a sense of seriousness and urgency about cleaning... let alone about cleaning to my satisfaction.

NEW Math Books!

I bought the sixth-grade Teaching Textbooks for use in our homeschool. It's a lot of fun! I would recommend getting the grade HIGHER than what you're starting now if you'd like to try it out (better yet, peruse the website, look at the tables of contents, allow your child to take a practice test and draw your own conclusions as to what is best for your child!). It says sixth grade on the cover, but I wouldn't get too excited about that part as much of the first quarter appears to be review. Place value and long division are re-covered in these first lessons. We have begun Singapore Math for our fifth grade studies, but I am using these Teaching Textbooks for our lesson about once a week. It slows us down a little bit, but I also figure that it's fun and it can't hurt to review on a weekly basis, or go over previously learned material in a new and different way.

I'd highly recommend getting this set, but I will warn you that it's a bit difficult to install. I finally had to resort to calling the company on my cell phone while I was at the computer doing this process. Hopefully, this review was helpful to someone thinking about purchasing math curriculum for a child. Teaching Textbooks are available through CBD as well as the company's own website for the *same* price, and shipping is included. I would advise against getting an extra workbook in the lower grades, however, as the answers to workbook pages are easily worked out on a scrap paper.

It's NOT Ok.

Woodjie goes to preschool soon, and it's going to be so special. Too bad it has to be in this district, and too bad for me that I'm heavily invested in this house and didn't know back when I was house-hunting what I know now...

I went to get testing results yesterday. To my mind, testing results and IEP drafting are separate things. But I got a "draft IEP" foisted on me during this meeting and was told I *MUST* sign it within ten days. Well... I have a problem with this.

Then there's the fact that these IEP goals look like they've been written for someone else. Maybe because they HAVE! Someone else's child's name is on some places in this IEP! OH... and guess what? Childname was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. That's nice to know, because Woodjie does not have a formal diagnosis!! ... hmm...

This is an obvious cut and paste job, and not only that, it's an obvious violation of privacy for that other family! I've googled his unusual first name and can't find his folks. (Better believe I'd call his mom and tell her what's up if I found her!) I've googled the preschool and can't find a student directory. I know there is another boy with the same sorts of difficulties who would have started the same preschool this month. Bet you that's his IEP. How stinkin' convenient can it be to just put them both in the same therapies, work on the same goals, check off the same lists?

Crap. Not to be paranoid, but I think that's what's going on. You know, there's this idea floating out there in Educationland (somewhere near Happytown and Flowerville) that sometimes parents like to CONTRIBUTE to the IEP.

I don't like causing trouble, particularly since this preschool is the only nice bunch of people this side of middle school. But... I'm being pressured to sign an IEP that doesn't have special goals for Woodjie, that obviously isn't even written for him... to fulfill some sort of state timeline that I "have" to get done.

I'm feeling angry and stuck. I'm also feeling it's going to get worse as time goes on for my little fella. I'm also feeling sometimes I might have to plain old deal with things that are JUST PLAIN WRONG because Woodjie needs extra help. If Woodjie were an only child, I might be able to homeschool him now. I'd have TWO hands to grab him if he started to run in parking lots. He'd have total undivided attention all day. But he doesn't get that. It's just impossible.

I wish for the strength and energy to fight this... but more than that... I wish to know where to begin and what the potential consequences might be. You know, the ones that aren't written down.

Then again, am I a pessimist to think that it's all gonna go to crap later anyway, so I might as well get people angry now? I'd hate to do that. I was hoping to get along with these people and play nice for a couple years.

Why does parenting these kids have to be so hard? And no, I don't mean the special needs of the kid... I mean dealing with coordinating all the stuff the special needs kid ought to have and figuring out what's available, plusses and minuses, and then figuring out the best. And then knowing the best is never perfect. Knowing things will not always turn out well.

Ah, well. Maybe I should just be grateful they're not going to lock him in a closet and shut up already. Maybe I should just be grateful, period. But I feel let down this morning.

Dear Teen Facebook Users

Your friend's MOM has access to your friend's account. Occasionally she logs on AS your friend, because that's the deal in your friend's house. Your friend's MOM checks on what is on the computer and what your friend is up to. That means unbeknownst to you, she is looking at your profile pictures. She reads your statuses. She finds out what YOU are up to on a Saturday night, because she wants to know all about who her kids are hanging out with and "friending."

She learns so much about teen life she never would have known just from asking your friend. Because usually? Your friend comes home and how was school? Fine. Did you have a good day? Yes. What did you do? Stuff... like... usual stuff.

Just so you know? Y'all are so tame compared to me as a teen. And that's a good thing. If I found a "past me" type getting friended, my kid would totally lose facebook for a month. That, or I would tell my kid something like, "You need to go tell lil Miss C that her attitude toward her mommy was ungodly, turn or burn, and repent right now. There's the comment box. Start typing."

But seriously. I appreciate that God has changed your 14-year-old life, that you like the JONAS BROTHERS AND JESUS VERY MUCH (whoever they are... well, ok, I sorta know who JESUS is...) and that you've achieved a level three in some aquarium world.

PS. Nice picture in that little aquarium! I'm glad you love playing with the aquarium and the FarmTown stuff. I'm a YoVille fan myself.

PPS. I also see that you and my son must have attended the same clses b/c u dont know hw 2 use eng. so gd. Sigh.

Saying Goodbye

Our fourth-grade Singapore math books and some of our ABeka readers went into the homeschool storage box a bit ago. As excited as the children were at the prospect of receiving NEW books, they were sad to see the old ones go. But Mom is a bit picky about the pricey curriculum stuff. It goes back into storage so we don't lose it. Many of the regular books we read (such as the Wizard of Oz and the like) are still on the children's shelves. I will pick those out for Woodjie and Rose as there is interest later. I keep praying that Woodjie will need to use one of the math books that is now tucked away.

Local News

A young woman from a nearby suburb is assaulted, kidnapped, and killed. This is a town where almost nothing big ever happens. It has a Wal-Mart, a couple used clothing stores, and a few restaurants. Farms and bitty houses. Green Acres meets inner city. It's a way out from Kansas City, so it draws people who can't afford a house in the nicer suburbs, but don't want to live in the city. If you could imagine Farmer Joe's grandkids without the farm to work on, living in a rural slum, this would be the town.

The schools are dreadful. There is a big drug problem out that way.

I know one family that moved there from my suburb because the land was cheap. She said since she's homeschooling, she doesn't have to worry about the crummy schools. And since she takes her children to a church near my suburb, she doesn't have to worry about her kids getting the wrong friends, either. I have to say I understand this thinking as, although I live in a modest middle-class neighbourhood, we've had our share of hoods on the block. NO WAY my kids are hanging out with them. Things got better. Things can always change.

I'm just chatting with you. The news story is very vague on what the murdered woman was doing to "turn her life around." Turn it around from what? Just the mention that it happened in Excelsior Springs makes me think it's drugs. The mention of her being in her early 20's with two children that don't live with her, and her owing some guy $500, and her being attacked by three people and stuffed into a trunk? It's a strong possibility we're talking about drugs.

I know there has been a lot of death in the news of late, and stories of violence. When I read stories like this, I think we're not really fighting the war on drugs and terrorism like a real war. But then I think that maybe we are, and perhaps there are thousands of stories I'll never hear about brave men and women fighting against these things... but the editors somewhere think it isn't interesting enough to publish, or it cannot be published because the fight is ongoing.

Well... I just read the news, and I get sad sometimes.

Why Are There No Pictures to This Post?

I usually start snipping near the head and work my way down to the tail. I don't know why, but I find things easier that way. The cat's fur is EXTREMELY overgrown. She's leaving furballs all over the house, and Patrick's bed is just covered with her fluffy hair. Just covered. And this cat has the long sort of hair that just sticks to everything. It can't just be brushed off; the blanket will have to be washed and dried, and I'll have to scoop hot fuzz out of the dryer later.

(Please... nobody pop on to my blog after googling "hot fuzz." Please.)

Mopsy's age must be somewhere between 16 and 17 years old. She walks with a hitch to her right back leg. The vet says it's arthritis in her hips, and to give her a baby asprin about once a week if we like. I'd rather not medicate her. Not because I'm concerned about the side effects of a medication so much. At nearly 17 human years of age, the object of the game at this point is to make her as comfortable as possible, risks be darned. You go ahead and treat me the same way when I'm 95 and hurting.

Have you ever tried giving pills to a cat? When we first got her about 13 years ago, she needed a pill for something or other. She was spry back in the day; my goodness. More than once we got bitten. I finally rigged up a plastic tampon applicator system to *pop* that puppy way into the back of her throat instead of using my finger. I told the vet about my brilliant (if disgusting) device later on, and he told me they had already invented it. It's called a "pill-pusher," and is considerably longer than a tampon applicator, and thinner, too. We got one to put in our whatnot drawer. If we were to die suddenly in a car wreck, it would be easier for my surviving children to explain to the relatives at the house than a tampon applicator with tooth marks on it, you betya.

The groomer costs about $45, and all they do is shave her and leave a little poof on the tip of her tail. It looks *good* when they are finished, but I just can't justify the expense. I use a comb and a pair of scissors. I comb a bit of hair and cut next to the comb. This way, I don't cut her loose skin. She's old, and she has a lot of loose skin, especially on her tummy. Let it not be said that when we get old and flabby, that it's because we had lots of kids. This cat was fixed.

The result of chopping her hair this way is that it looks... choppy. Chunky. I miss spots here and there as the cat mrreeows her objections and kinda growls. Oh, well. It's getting to be a hazard to human health, these furballs are. I keep the trash can to one side and dump chunks of fur in as I go. Between her skin rolls and thick fur, I really need to be careful as I am cutting. It's hard to even know what I'm holding onto sometimes, her fur is so thick.

After about 45 minutes, I'm making some progress. I'm down to the back end. Combing, cutting. Combing, cutting. I find a large cylindrical object, covered in fur. Smelly, too.

Yes, it was.

There is no telling how long it had been matted into her fur or what household objects she came into contact with. But suffice to say that as she's aged, she hasn't groomed herself so well as she might. As disgusting as this job was, I must declare that I'm justified in grooming all "personal areas" on my cat. She didn't appreciate that very much. She appreciated the bath and strategic soaping and kitchen sprayer washover even less.

She is currently hiding... somewhere. I have no plans to find her at the present moment to see what my chop job looks like after it's been washed and dried.

So, what was your accomplishment of the day? Do you have pictures? :]