Emperor swallowed his tooth at dinnertime! I'm freaking out and calling our insurance nurseline. Eeeek! And she's asking all kinds of questions. Emperor keeps interjecting that I *must* tell her that his tooth didn't taste very good.
Is he coughing?
Can he breathe?
Well, *I* can't very well. I feel like my heart is in my stomach. The recommendation of the nurse? EVERY POOP must be smashed up and passed through a screen for the next three days. If it isn't "out" by then, he needs to see a doctor.
This kid is nearly 5 feet tall. Think his poops will be little and cute like my 2-year-old's? Um, and even my two-year-old's poo can be ... unpleasant at times. But, I think, without getting too detailed, that it would be "malleable" within the diaper to the point that I would feel a tooth.
So now we have an ice cream bucket upstairs. But no screen! I have a couple plastic forks and knives from Wendy's meals of long ago. Should I give the children homeschool science credit for going through the poo? But what if they miss the tooth? Eeeeeew, **I** don't want to have to go through poo.
I think I'm going to retch.
Then again, what if his tooth gets stuck in his intestines? That would be a way worse thing than my going "eeeeew" over some poopie. Silly mom.
Maybe they can throw the poo in the backyard, put their shoes on and STOMP. Then hose off shoes. But we're poor folks and my boys have only one pair of shoes.
Hm. Please tell me there are more reasonable ideas out there. Eeeew.