16 November 2009

Tinkle Time.

This is a serious issue! I'm not kidding.

Now, when you have a budget crisis and you close rest stops on the highway, you present motorists with a genuine problem. I have to admit it isn't a biggie if you close rest stops in the middle of a city. Just pull off to the nearest McDonald's, go potty, wash your hands with antibacterial soap, grumble that there are no towels, use the hair dryer thingies and maybe grab a soda and off ya go.

But in the boonies where exits can be 20 miles apart... and even then, there are difficulties finding a bathroom because the one store in town closes after midnight... well, it's just wrong to do. At least give folks a designated place to pull over and poop in their own cars. But if I'm not mistaken, there are laws against public nudity. Ladies wearing pants are NOT going to be able to pee without a blanket tied 'round their waist and even then... it can be most soggily unpleasant. And can you imagine stopping suddenly and having "slosh problems?" Not to be gross and crude, but I'm thinking it has to happen somewhere, sometime.

Then again... that's the least of our worries. Now imagine yourself in the boonies driving and SUDDENLY RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU is a guy peeing by the side of the road. Don't tell me this couldn't happen, or that you would *never ever* be in danger of hitting the fellow. To my mind, rest stops are a public health and safety concern just like having police officers on the street.

And further... do you not think that if there is an outbreak of something contagious that can be transmitted by bowel movements or urine, that having people throw their ziplock baggies in the nearest Wal-Mart trash can might not be a problem? Or mowers hitting an occasional roadside bomb might not be more than a disgusting nuisance? You don't think cleaning that stuff up might actually cost MORE than leaving the rest stops open in more rural areas?

I guess what I'm asking for is some consistency. If you don't want to keep rest stops open, fine. I will have to go *somewhere,* and if McDonald's isn't available and I'm far from home, a ziplock bag it is. And public nudity? My not being able to wash my hands after? Deal with it.

Now... where are the politicians who approved of these closings? I want to shake their hands.

12 comments:

  1. Luckily I wasn't driving because in France the guys face the road & wave at you as you pass. I nearly passed out but having seen their loos I get the point about not using them. Just turn your backs, fellas, ok?

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  2. that last line made me LOL

    I think we should invent a car with toliet facilities ;)

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  3. Ganeida, I don't know if the rumour is true or not, but I hear they blow their noses without Kleenex there, too! I hope it's not truuuue...

    Dianne, I think so, too... but something that doesn't spill back if I stop suddenly, yk?

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  4. I have seen the nose blowing thing too...EEEEW!!!

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  5. I haven't heard anyone use the word "tinkle" in the longest time! My mom used to say that.

    We have the man peeing on the side of the road here, too, but unfortunately it's not always on a lonely stretch of highway. Yuck! At least they usually turn their backs.

    Here in Japan we have these emergency toileting thingies. We carry them in the car when we have a potty training kid just in case. It looks like a cup with a bag attached, and the bag has the same stuff used in disposable diapers inside it to absorb the liquid. Shall I send you some?

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  6. You're hilarious! Shake their hands!!! I totally feel for you...even though the kiddos are in diapers and I'm not pregnant and having the "emergency stops". They closed all the rest stops on the way to Red's...I'll be hoping for a nap as we drive by next pregnancy.

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  7. OMG, haha! That is great.

    Hey, I have a friend who keeps the kids potty seat in the car in case someone has to pee or whatever on a long drive.

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  8. Sue, I had NO IDEA there was such a thing. You've got to at least send me a picture link to these things.

    Mrs. K, people are really understanding of the little one learning to pee, but the fat old man squatting to make a huge BM by the side of the road? Not so much. Seems people don't think the potty thing is cute anymore past a certain point. :P

    Virginia, that either takes a LOT of cleaning and is a big pain... or it smells after a while. And what if you stop suddenly? Tidal wave!

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  9. I laughed so hard reading this. But you're right, it is a shame they closed down the rest stops.

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  10. This made me laugh. My mom and grandma always traveled with a Foldgers coffee can. Try using that when traveling in the dark down the Penn. Turnpike. r

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  11. There is the diaper option. I hear they make adult sizes too now.

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