27 October 2010

More Meow Talk


I keep moving her, but she keeps putting
her head back, so I'll work around it.
 The cat is now not moving one of her legs very well at all.  She's moving sorta like an old lady who has no idea she needs a walker or perhaps a very awful stuntman.  She is urinating all over the place constantly.  D took a look at her at my urging and just came out with a sullen look. 

"She's dying," he told me.  Nuh-uh.  She was doing better.  Sure, she hasn't eaten more than a bite in two days and doesn't walk more than a step from the litter to the water dish, but she's no longer rolling in her own poo.  She's sitting on a towel.  Sigh.  The vet made it pretty clear last visit (only a few weeks ago!) that she's a very old cat, but she may need some specialized ($$$) tests for thisnthat if she starts to have a change in her bladder habits.  Well, I thought it was the flu (it wasn't just bladder at first, and was sudden with vomiting, poo-ing, glassy eyes and lethargy) and she'd either die or get over it, it was so awful and sudden. 

Then she was twitching a bit last night.  But today she is fine except for her leg.  And she is not looking at people but keeps putting her head sideways into the cat dish.  I can't make it out... may need to consider taking her in, but I'm afraid to.  The doctor would ask for expensive tests and I would say YES in a minute, just fix her.  D already said NO... we need to let her go if it's time.  I'm tempted to tell him he has to be the bad guy who says no to the tests, then... but we will see.  I wish things could be more clear and that the cat would purr or look over again.  She seems to be ignoring people now.  It's just so hard to see.

I keep walking into the bathroom expecting her to be fully lively and finished with cleaning herself up... or very still on the floor.  She is neither.  I hardly even know how to pray for the cat.  Ever feel that way about situations sometimes?  You hardly know what to wish.  You know that God is all-powerful, but you don't want a half-baked miracle.  You want it done right the first time, but you feel sorta pushy asking for it in just that way.  I think finally maybe I will just ask for a little more time, and ask for the time to be good and comfortable.  That's it.

Well... here's hoping.  Thanks if you got through this whole post.

8 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry, Mrs. C. We lost many cats to kidney failure. It is always so sad. And to have to decide what to do...I don't envy you. Good Luck, I was wondering about the poor thing today.

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  2. Totally our call as to what to do ... poor cat.

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  3. We went through this last year with our cat and it was awful. The vet said their was nothing we could do, so we spent our last day snuggled together on the bed. She is now under her favorite tree in the yard with her best friend who passed exactly one month before she did.

    My prayers to you and your family.

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  4. It's a terrible feeling, losing a friend.

    You are making sure that her last days are comfortable and safe. What more could anyone do?

    I feel so sad for you, because it brings back hard memories of losing 'my boys'.When Roscoe died, I spent the morning rocking him in his blanket until the end, telling him stories about when I first adopted him, and what a wonderful boy he was.With Bird, I found him only moments before he passed away. Both times my heart was broken.

    Praying that Mopsy is pain free and at peace-while being bathed in love and honored as all cats should, but most are not. She has had a long life... but how wonderful too be so loved, and have so many wishing for one more day with her. Thinking of you all with a heavy heart. :(

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  5. She is meowing pitifully and will go to the vet this afternoon. I don't know that he can do anything, though, as she doesn't walk at all. We think she may have had a stroke.

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  6. Mrs.C- It sure sounds that way, poor kitty. Prayers of comfort for all. Hugs.

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  7. I hate losing animals. It is the saddest thing and I cry my eyes out everytime. :( Sorry.

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  8. Mrs C,

    I am terribly sorry. It does not matter how long they are with us, it is never long enough. I am approaching this with one of mine too and have been through it with others. A piece of advice given to me by a dog trainer sometime back has helped some. "I worked so hard to give them full, comfortable, happy lives and to keep them pain free, that it only seems fair to give them that same gift when they reach the end of their lives." But you are the only one who can truly know when that is and I wish you peace and hope that you will trust yourself to make the right decision.

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