Advice From My Dreams.

*Do your eyes itch?  Put down the X-acto knife before you rub them.

* Do not use age-progression software on the Disney Princesses to see what they will look like in 50 years.  Whoa.  Snow White still dyes her hair black, but is very wrinkly and wears a bathrobe.  The Prince in the movie has these huge ears and says "What the hell, I try anything once" and winks all the time.  Which I guess makes sense considering the fact that he was willing to kiss a total stranger while she was asleep... and let bunches of dwarves watch... ok that's weird...

* Bikes.  Roller coaster tracks.  Don't mix these!  That was scary!  I woke up before I died, thankfully.  I've heard that if you die in your dream, you die in real life.  Then I wonder how anyone would possibly know this to be a fact.

* I do NOT know why the US Army is accepting a 41-year-old woman who is 80 pounds overweight, had several abdominal surgeries, and sure can't lift 40 pounds, into the service.  Nor do I understand why they want her to jump out of an airplane without teaching her what to do or how to put the special backpack on.  Do not dream this dream again; what did I eat that night??

* I know it is a down economy, so I'd like to know how I landed that job as a reviewer of restaurant kitchens.  That's right!  I don't even eat in the restaurant; I spot-review restaurant KITCHENS and take pictures.  If I'm refused access, that's a bad write-up.  If the place lets me in, whoo, do I take good pictures AND I have a special sidebar "smell of the kitchen" review in which I rate whether the kitchen smells like a good place to eat. One local steak place got a bad mark because its kitchen smelled like a refrigerator.  Two stars and a baking soda box recommendation.

* Any ideas what it all MEANS?  Been having odd dreams lately.