26 February 2012

The Magic Pudding and Other Tales

Once upon a time, this vanilla pudding was new from Sam's Club.  As we were bringing it home, however, it was dropped and dented.  That was about seven years ago.  Since then, we've been using it as a door stopper.  Recently, good nutrition and safe food preparation was discussed in Elf's cooking class.  The children were (I kid you not!) told to go home and find the OLDEST, most expired food they could find.  Ok, so it was a fishing expedition.  I sent Elf in with a whopper of a fish, didn't I?  He won some sort of prize for having the most expired food.  Seriously.  I think they gave him a school lunch or something for it.  D got upset that his pudding can was not returned to him and so I made Elf go retrieve it.  I think they were planning on actually THROWING IT AWAY after the "Expired Food Museum" display was dismantled.  Nope.  We need that back.  Elf tells me he "forgot" to mention that we use it as a door stopper.  And in answer to your question, YES, our membership is current with HSLDA.
About a year ago, I purchased a large collection of what I would call "1980's girl going to church" hairbows in a ziplock bag from a local thrift store.  I washed them and dried them and put them away for about six months.  Now, Rose wears them all the time.  I didn't realize how HIDEOUSLY TACKY these things really were.  But she loves them.  To her, they are "princess" bows.

I pack all Elf's expired food into this lunch box before I send him to school.  Nom nom nom.  Ok, seriously?  He is having trouble talking with the other children during lunch in middle school.  It seems conversation must revolve around Lady Gaga or how awful Mrs. D and the other teachers are.  Elf says he really likes Mrs. D!  And so he has nothing to talk about.  Also?  Other kids say things like, "My dad is an alcoholic!" or "My mom is a lesbian!"  I thought surely not.  I asked a teacher about it (he is starting a "social skills" group soon as specified in his IEP and I was asked about specific social difficulties at school) and she said that yes, this is a normal conversation topic.  Incidentally, Elf learnt a new "greeting" involving his middle finger.  Some random kid taught him this, other kids got concerned and told.  Random kid got into trouble.  The vice-principal also (bless her!) talked to Elf a little bit about the "that's not a proper greeting" aspect of the bird.  Elf needs to learn social skills, I guess.  And plus, Elf's IEP mentions that he didn't have opportunity for many of these um, social learning experiences because of his homeschooling.  Sorry about that, society.

Yes!  It's me!  I finally figured out how to take a picture of myself AND make sure the mirror is clean AND make sure the flash is off!  Yay!  Please ignore the fact that I am taking photos of myself in the bathroom and then blogging about it.

12 comments:

  1. :) an interesting, newsy update!
    Loved the use of aged food products as a door stopper :)

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  2. Can't think of a better use for canned pudding. :-P

    And every little girl needs hideous hair bows! Her childhood would not be complete without them! I bet she is ADORABLE!

    And finally, it is so nice to see a picture of you!!!!

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  3. Ha! Ha! Ha! I loved this post. I learned the bird in 4th grade, I guess I was advanced or just went to a particularly bad school. Bless his heart. He could probably teach most of the kids a thing or two about proper social skills, seriously! And, I thought "oh that must be HEM when she was like 14." You look like a teenager! Love it! :-)

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  4. Ha Ha! I use the bathroom mirror for photos too. It's huge and the one in the bedroom is tiny and not well lit.
    Pudding as a doorstop.....my mum used to make pudding so thick you had to cut it with a knife, it might have made a good doorstop.

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  5. It's so nice to see the happy elf mom. Of course you could have one of the younguns take your picture. :-)

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  6. yes, we've had our kids take pics of us but we'll make them stand on a chair so they don't get an unflattering "up shot" of us. LOL

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  7. Okay, LOVE the pudding story! I bet they were a wee bit scared when he needed his old natty pudding back! lol

    The bows- on a little girl they are adorable no matter what. Good for Rose!

    I think it's GREAT that he got to this age without knowing what a crude and disrespectful gesture that is! And, now I know for sure and for certain when you lose your temper you don't flip the kids off. Ha! :P

    Either your bathroom counter is incredibly tall, or you my dear are incredibly short. Or playing hide and seek? Regardless, you are adorably cute and I can see where they kids get their cutie pie faces from!

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  8. I quite like the bows!
    Well done on the self photography.

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  9. I think you should decorate the can and make it a work of art door stopper
    it can be an heirloom!!

    the hairbows are lovely, Hope would wear them and look at herself in the morror a lot

    Hugs to Elf, I always ate lunch alone in grammar school because one of the girls told everyone that I was "the girl whose father is crazy and she's fat"

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  10. Yeah, I've always considered it more of a salute and less of a greeting myself... and salutes should be saved for the most special of occasions.

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  11. You are very trendy to take pictures in the bathroom. All the teenage girls are doing it. Seriously! I can't tell you how many my girls have and every time I check my phone I think I find more.

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    1. i was also going to add that at least you are not standing with your hand on your hip trying to get just the right angle to show off your blingy jeans! hehe

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Non-troll comments always welcome! :)