Who's this "Michael Jackson" guy on the magazine? I asked Elf and Emperor one day at Wal-Mart.
"I dunno," Elf said, disinterested.
"Ok, how about this lady?" I asked, pointing to Oprah.
"Why are you asking us this?" Emperor wanted to know. "I've never met her before. How am I supposed to know who she is?"
"O-kay. Probably just as well. But who is THIS?"
"That's Paris Hilton."
"You KNEW that?" Guess the youth marketing culture has gotten to him, after all.
"Yes. See? It says so here. I can read, you know."
I'm aware that my children are pretty culture-clueless. I picked some secular Evan-Moor stuff and a Spectrum vocabulary book for Elf and Emperor to use this year to help in that regard for English class. They have to be coached through these assignments. There are questions such as, how are Baby Ruth, Milky Way and Almond Joy similar?
"They are all Proper Nouns," was written neatly on the line.
Why do I have to explain that Elmer's glue has nothing to do with cartoons? Aren't children supposed to be born "just knowing" these things?I'm telling you, we do get out sometimes. But when we're in a restaurant and Emperor asks who "Bud-way-zur" is, and I explain that it's a beer, I shouldn't see Elf pulling on his imaginary beard and thinking about ordering one so he can see what it looks like on him. Then the *GASP* and look of shock and HORROR that they serve ALCOHOL AT A RESTAURANT!!! Sigh. I halfway wonder if I should just not tell them these things until we get to the car and are on our way home. But then I wonder why the kid is thinking they serve "beards" in a restaurant.
I could almost count it as a class if I were to take these boys outside and explain things like, the grass can also be called the lawn and "the front yard." Pebbles and gravel are kind of the same thing, and please don't demand a half hour explanation about howcome.
The person on line in front of you talking of someone "living in Boulder" does NOT mean it like you think she does. And she didn't want to hear about Fred Flintstone and that thing Dino did last week on TV. Really. It wasn't related.
And maybe it isn't a good idea to tell the nice lady trying to help you find a fun book that you don't appreciate the "baby" books, and then rattle on that you have already read Dracula and don't need the kid's version, you would like the UNabridged version of Oliver Twist and OOOOOH! THEY HAVE TELETUBBIES HERE!!! Yay!
It kinda makes it look like Mom is raising you funny.