04 November 2009

Why Are There No Pictures to This Post?

I usually start snipping near the head and work my way down to the tail. I don't know why, but I find things easier that way. The cat's fur is EXTREMELY overgrown. She's leaving furballs all over the house, and Patrick's bed is just covered with her fluffy hair. Just covered. And this cat has the long sort of hair that just sticks to everything. It can't just be brushed off; the blanket will have to be washed and dried, and I'll have to scoop hot fuzz out of the dryer later.

(Please... nobody pop on to my blog after googling "hot fuzz." Please.)

Mopsy's age must be somewhere between 16 and 17 years old. She walks with a hitch to her right back leg. The vet says it's arthritis in her hips, and to give her a baby asprin about once a week if we like. I'd rather not medicate her. Not because I'm concerned about the side effects of a medication so much. At nearly 17 human years of age, the object of the game at this point is to make her as comfortable as possible, risks be darned. You go ahead and treat me the same way when I'm 95 and hurting.

Have you ever tried giving pills to a cat? When we first got her about 13 years ago, she needed a pill for something or other. She was spry back in the day; my goodness. More than once we got bitten. I finally rigged up a plastic tampon applicator system to *pop* that puppy way into the back of her throat instead of using my finger. I told the vet about my brilliant (if disgusting) device later on, and he told me they had already invented it. It's called a "pill-pusher," and is considerably longer than a tampon applicator, and thinner, too. We got one to put in our whatnot drawer. If we were to die suddenly in a car wreck, it would be easier for my surviving children to explain to the relatives at the house than a tampon applicator with tooth marks on it, you betya.

The groomer costs about $45, and all they do is shave her and leave a little poof on the tip of her tail. It looks *good* when they are finished, but I just can't justify the expense. I use a comb and a pair of scissors. I comb a bit of hair and cut next to the comb. This way, I don't cut her loose skin. She's old, and she has a lot of loose skin, especially on her tummy. Let it not be said that when we get old and flabby, that it's because we had lots of kids. This cat was fixed.

The result of chopping her hair this way is that it looks... choppy. Chunky. I miss spots here and there as the cat mrreeows her objections and kinda growls. Oh, well. It's getting to be a hazard to human health, these furballs are. I keep the trash can to one side and dump chunks of fur in as I go. Between her skin rolls and thick fur, I really need to be careful as I am cutting. It's hard to even know what I'm holding onto sometimes, her fur is so thick.

After about 45 minutes, I'm making some progress. I'm down to the back end. Combing, cutting. Combing, cutting. I find a large cylindrical object, covered in fur. Smelly, too.

Yes, it was.

There is no telling how long it had been matted into her fur or what household objects she came into contact with. But suffice to say that as she's aged, she hasn't groomed herself so well as she might. As disgusting as this job was, I must declare that I'm justified in grooming all "personal areas" on my cat. She didn't appreciate that very much. She appreciated the bath and strategic soaping and kitchen sprayer washover even less.

She is currently hiding... somewhere. I have no plans to find her at the present moment to see what my chop job looks like after it's been washed and dried.

So, what was your accomplishment of the day? Do you have pictures? :]

15 comments:

  1. lol great cat story :o) My cat has that flaby on the belly thing. It great when she runs, her belly sways back and forth lol.

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  2. ha! I love the tampon invention. With the dogs, I just drop the pill on the floor and yell, "NO! Do not eat that!"

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  3. ha! I love the tampon invention. With the dogs, I just drop the pill on the floor and yell, "NO! Do not eat that!"

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  4. LOL Leelee, my cat is so furry we can't tell...

    Allison that is so classic!! I can't tell you all the stuff I've seen dogs eat. Well, you can imagine.

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  5. I am boring. No cat stories today; no doggie stories BUT Ditz has a performance outfit & that is nothing short of a mirical!!!! Pictures is asking just to much.☺

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  6. Wow, I'm impressed. I can't imagine trying to cut my pet's hair. But then I can't even do a half-way decent job on human hair. The results were not pretty when I tried.

    You always manage to crack me up. The whole tampon explanation is hilarious. Especially the leaving your kids to explain part:)

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  7. I have six cats (all short-haired, thank goodness :) ) I'm good a pilling them--the trick is in the technique--stroll up behind the unsuspecting feline, preferably while snoozing, scruff, flip head back, separate jaws insert pill behind tongue. Done. Over the years I've pilled all my own as well as many others. Often with my fingers, occasionally with the pill popper. Nothing to it.

    Except for Isaac, the gentlest feline we have, gives great hugs, is Daniel's "puppy cat". Isaac ability to spit out medicine, gagging it back up (even if it's liquid) dumbfounded the vet. We've learned to pound pills to powder and hide them in tuna. Make sure he's really, really hungry, and then give it to him.

    LOL Allison. :)

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  8. 1) Tampon Applicator had me laughing outloud!

    2) Smelly cylindrical object = EW!

    and

    I think #2 (hah!) justifies the groomer. Just sayin.

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  9. What have I accomplished today? Ummm....well, I gave my daughters a bath and I cleaned my two year old's poop that she did in the tub. Ha! There is one for you. She cried trying to tell me she had to poopoo but since she can't talk much I didn't know what she was saying. Therefore, I had to hurry them out of the tub five minutes later and clean it. That and I got a load of laundry done. That is IT! Very nonproductive day. Well, we did carve pumpkins today and make a huge mess.

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  10. Ganeida, I know you've blogged on the performance outfit problems before so I'll just celebrate the miracle with you. *Alleluuuuuia* LOL

    Mykidsmom, isn't it sad, but that's seriously why I spent actual money on the pill pusher. I'm figuring the kids would have enough grief LOL...

    Mary, you're goooood. I had never thought of the sleeping cat thing!

    Deb, you're probably right, but what's even more disgusting is that I use the same hair clippers on my kids. Yep. I mean, I save a lot of money that way...

    Mind you, the kids get their hair cut naked in the kitchen, then get broomed off and sent to the bath. I can't believe my otherwise sweet 16-y-o is starting to rebel against this process! I even let him wear underwear. :p

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  11. Virginia, you carved pumpkins today?? Are you going to set up your Christmas tree in January? I am bummered that you didn't take pics of "fishing for nuggets" for the blog. LOL

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  12. So... did you get any hits for the 'hot fuzz'???

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  13. Not yet! Got yet another for "used underwear," though...

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  14. I've never had to give a cat a pill, but your cat sounds like our baby. Whenever we give him medicine, he spits it back out.

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  15. This is hilarious. My parents cat seemed to live forever. But at the end she didn't have any teeth left so she couldn't bite them when they tried to give her pills. They had the cat for 21 years and she was a stray who was pregnant so who knows how long she really lived.

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Non-troll comments always welcome! :)