05 January 2010

Religious Stuff on the 'Net.

I'm Jewish! Who knew?? LOL Well, these are my results from a the Belief-O-Matic quiz:

Orthodox Judaism: 100%
Eastern Orthodox: 93%
Roman Catholic: 93%
Seventh Day Adventist: 92%
Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant: 91%

Hat tip to Darren for the quiz link. I'm sure it's scientifically accurate, though I'm thinking my refusal to plop God into a "Trinity" category is what caused this shift between what I identify myself as... and what the quiz figures I am. So I guess I can't join your church if absolute ready-to-die for the concept of Trinity is a membership requirement. Conversely, am I going to say that what was contained in the bodily Jesus is all there is to God? He was just playing cosmic puppet show when He got baptized? Maybe Mrs. C is wishy-washy, or she just realizes she doesn't have all the answers, or she is too lazy to fast for 27 days and pray until God reveals the answer. (Maybe I just don't wanna know that bad and am happy with not understanding it all... oh well. Other stuff to do.)

And in other news, Jesus was autistic. Yep... that's right. And what a wasted life He lived, too, eh?

"The present authors, having taken at least a cursory glance at all peer-reviewed articles produced by means of an Internet search performed on June 6, 2006, and filtered by means of the keywords 'Christ+autism+disability+burden+tragedy,' have reached the unanimous and infallible conclusion that the man once known as Jesus of Nazareth, sometimes also as Jesus of Galilee, sometimes also as the Messiah, sometimes finally as Jesus the Christ (ambiguous self-identity is another well-known symptom of autism), did indeed suffer the debilitating consequences of a form of autistic spectrum disorder, sometimes known as ASD... adequate support has been provided in this article for all the basic diagnostic criteria in the case of Jesus—the social awkwardness, the language difficulties, the obsessive interests, and not to mention, a sickening disregard for the medical profession."

The article laments the lack of care and ABA therapy Jesus experienced. Maybe I shouldn't laugh at this stuff, but I did.

6 comments:

  1. I scored 100% Unitarian Universalism and I scored in the 90s for many forms of Buddhism
    I was also a Liberal Quaker

    my absolute lowest score was for Roman Catholism which is the religion I was raised in, I found that really interesting

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  2. I did this a while back & scored all over the board ~ but least in the areas I actually practise my faith. No idea how they reach their conclusions. Why not just ask people? ☺

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  3. I scored a 100% Traditional Quaker. Not a big surprise, really as I find many of their beliefs in line with my own interpretation of the scriptures.

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  4. That was a difficult test. There was sometimes no good answer, at least not one that reflected my positions.

    Anyway....no suprises in my results:

    1. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (100%)
    2. Orthodox Quaker (95%)
    3. Eastern Orthodox (94%)
    4. Roman Catholic (94%)
    5. Seventh Day Adventist (93%)

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  5. I've taken this several times and always get 95-100% Orthodox Judaism...but there were several questions that I felt needed an extra answer. I do like beliefnet.com overall.

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  6. Uh, I don't even know how this makes sense, but I am:

    1. Orthodox Judaism (100%)
    2. Baha'i Faith (97%)
    3. Islam (95%)
    4. Orthodox Quaker (94%)
    5. Seventh Day Adventist (85%)

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Non-troll comments always welcome! :)