29 September 2011

Rickets!




G's pretend phone number. 
Patrick spent the morning telling me (and everyone) that he had rickets.  No argument will convince him that it is, in fact, impossible for him to have rickets.  The guy is almost 6 ft 2 inches tall!  Who has rickets at that height??  "Rrrrrricketss," he would reply to every reasonable thing I had to say to him.  "I'm just going to say rrrrickets."

Okayy.  Well.  The dude is driving me nutty.  I keep telling him that he ought to apply for college.  That if he wants help filling out the handy-dandy-super FAFSA forms (you know, required if you don't have about $555,000 cash onhand to go to college?) that he needs to give me a bit of notice and I can do that.  In fact, no way he can do it on his own because he has no access to our financial stuff.

Now he's back to saying that he doesn't really want to go to college.  Dude.  You need a full-time job.  With benefits.  You cannot live at home and stay in the basement until you are nearly 50 like "Uncle Ben." (Ok, I made that name up.  Sounds rice-y.  But based on a true story.)  Oh, how unfortunate, he tells me.

But when pressed for more salient details about post-high school plans, Patrick told me that he is really working hard on getting a great job.  He is filling out an application for work at a local burger joint.  What is SAD is that he is dead-on serious.  These are his post-secondary plans, folks.  At least he hasn't mentioned the tent living or the idea that he would rake in $2,000 a week after holding a cardboard sign on the corner (lately).  And honestly?  He's been all over town several times dropping off his social security number, birthdate and address at random businesses.  You couldn't paper this town with his personal information better unless you air-dropped it or something.  Still no job. 

I wish Patrick would just *GAH!* do something.  He says I just want him to fit my "paradigm" but see?  The paradigm here is "we have bills."  Whoaaa, that's so deep, maaan, but I'm thinking he's not getting the grooviness of it all yet.

In other news, I found G had written "his" cell phone number under mine on the dry erase board.  D and I were quite worried there for a bit.  See, he has about $3 to his name and has a tendency to impulse buy.  No way he should be able to get a cell phone, and I sure don't wanna be liable for the $300/month texting fee he'll get.  So I asked him about it.

He smiled.  Well, he told me, he REALLY wants a cell phone.  He wants to have his own phone number.  So, he made one up and put it on the board under mine. 

That is just doggone cute.  You can't really call it when you want to chat with G, but it is doggone cute.  Do you like my shopping list?  I blurred out real numbers but left it up for your perusal.  :)

11 comments:

  1. Ha ha ha. Kinda cute. The college application thing sounds familiar though .. I seem to recall having to fill out all the applications after my kids said which colleges they were interested in... An opening which gave me a chance by the way to apply to a few they didn't express any interest about! You're right however ... Tic tic on the clock as the colleges will decide between Xmas and Easter.

    But why rickets ?

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  2. Does Patrick understand how much things cost when it comes to running a house? Would it help if he sat in on budget nights when the bills get added up and paid?
    He could see then how important college is to get a better job.
    I'm also wondering why rickets?

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  3. Ah, but Dad, I WANTED to get out of the house and go to college. Annnd it was totally paid for. Patrick is going, I don't know if it's worth it if I have to take out loans.

    And I'm going, if you don't, and you get sick, our insurance won't cover "guy staying in basement" situations. You have to be in school!


    River, Patrick knows there is no way he could afford his own car and insurance to drive to a job, let alone an apartment and cell phone... I guess it doesn't stop his great imagination...

    I have no idea "why rickets."

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  4. Let him know that under no uncertain terms that if he hasn't picked a college by Thanksgiving that you are enrolling him in (the most ghetto community college in your area). Plus, he'll have to work part time.

    That threat seems to get the kids in my area college searching. Some of them are OK with it though.

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  5. Actually, the community college and working part-time would be a great choice for him... and our budget. As a ps student in A+ it would be almost entirely paid for...

    But he has to apply...

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  6. I'm passing through some of the blogs and thought id stop and say hello. And i hope that you folks have a very nice fall weekend. Richard from the Amish community of Lebanon Pennsylvania.

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  7. I'm a bossy old heifer, but I chose Ben's Tech school. This is supposed to be his senior year in High School, but I got tired of homeschooling. HAD TO GET HIM OUT OF THE HOUSE. If he does well there, we go on to the next college, Clayton State, which feeds in to Georgia Tech in two years. Low cost that way...if he messes up, we're not out as much as if we sent him to Georgia Tech. I'm not sure he has what it takes, but I'm not counting him out, either.

    By the way, Andrea, it IS kinda ghetto (Southern Crescent Tech)...but I don't care. Breaking him in slowly...He moves out of the ghetto as he proves himself. He's doing great, by the way! I'm so cheap a part of me wants him to give up on college. It isn't for everyone. All I want is for him to be RICH...

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  8. Wow, you do have a big challenge there.

    I did like the shopping list. I find that when I happen upon an old one in my coat pocket or something, it's usually nearly identical to the new one. Maybe we should all just swap lists to change up our lives a bit.

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  9. He could get a cell phone that you pay by the minutes. When the card runs out, no more calling and texting.

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  10. Brains.... you are the first person I have seen admit that YOU got tired of homeschooling. OMG... I hear you. Homeschooling people who look down at you is HARD.

    Also, we seem reasonably close to each other. We should meet. You seem fun.

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  11. Patrick sounds like a normal teenager to me... but I do hope he goes on to College. Burger joints don't pay much, let alone the bills!

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Non-troll comments always welcome! :)