26 September 2012

Woodjie Update

I don't know what to say.  Woodjie's a good kid.  But.  Just about every day, I get notes home about how he "hit a friend" a couple times during the school day.  Or he "ran away and didn't want to join the class."  Or he "got so upset and angry he threw up a little."

I've chatted with his teacher a few times, have given what few suggestions I could for calming him down (which don't always work at home, but hey), and have sent in his weighted vest.  We are all of us trying/struggling to figure out what is going on.

His teacher and aide are working on charts about his behaviour.  You know, ABC type stuff. 

A - the antecedent.  What happened that caused the behaviour?
B - the behaviour that we'd sure not like to see.
C - the consequence of the behaviour (had to sit in time out, or whatever)

Right now, there seems to be no particular time of day and no rhyme or reason we can discern that causes Woodjie to flip.  I'm thinking if I were in that kindergarten class?  I wouldn't want to sit near Woodjie.

And the thing is, he's not perfect here at home, but he's not flipping out puking mad and hitting his "friends" all the time, either.

I would ordinarily be very, very distrustful of teachers, but this is Miss Flower, who was Elfie's kindergarten teacher.  She was lovely and sweet to Elf.  Things went downhill with a thud when she was no longer his teacher in first grade.  So for Woodjie?  It's so odd that we have the same (wonderful) teacher.  Because Woodjie is in a specialized autism class across town.  Hey, who knows, maybe working with super-great kids like Elf inspired her to take that job.

Yesterday I was very discouraged about Woodjie's behaviour chart.  I made D sign it because I don't always want to sign the bad stuff, and maybe if they saw that a man was signing these things they'd know we're really, really taking things seriously and are not personally endorsing playground violence and bla bla bla (insert silly argument here).

So D took the paper, scrawled his signature on the line and then wrote "A MAN" underneath.  I just left it because... I have no clue why.  Sometimes you have to laugh at stuff for no reason or you'll cry.

The good news is that today, Woodjie got all smiley faces on his take-home chart for the second time this school year.  So I'm rejoicing that yayyy... things went ok today.  Or at least well enough that the Zootsie Wumble got to play on the computer this afternoon.  Woot.

Hoping for many more days like this, but you can imagine how frustrating it is for Miss Flower, for Woodjie's aide, for me and for Woodjie.

8 comments:

  1. oh dear. For most of this post I was thinking maybe Woodjie should be home-schooled for a year or so, then I read about the good day and the smiley faces. Is he able to say what was so good about the day that everything went well? Was his own mood better and so things went well? Or was there a general class mood upswing that contributed? Were the classes easier? I know he is only in kindergarten, but if you can pinpoint a significant difference between good days and bad days that would be a help.

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  2. Oh man. I don't know why it has to be so hard sometimes for the little ones of this world.

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  3. Man, I (not so fondly) remember all of the "bless her heart but..." letters I got home for Jordan. From the itsy-bitsy bit I know about autistic kids, I feel like he may "flip-out" when he's had too much input. A room full of kids can be overstimulating.

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  4. I'm sorry. Continuing to pray that things get better.

    I would love to know what they thought of D writing what he did...his own self affirmation of his sexuality? Clearing it up that your spouse is a male?

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  5. There must be something setting him off that just isn't obvious to others. It must be very frustrating for him not being able to explain it. The fact that he had a good day after that seems to show that it's not something constant or permanent within the classroom... maybe? Even here at home we have good days and bad days with Nutkin. I really think, for whatever reason, that even the weather can affect him, just like it does me with my arthritis. I have found that often when I am hurting he is also out of sorts. What to do with that I'm not sure, but it does help me to have more sympathy.

    I will be praying for Woodgie, and for you and the teachers to be able to pinpoint any triggers!

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  6. Transitions for Aspies are hard--as you well know--for a kid who further along the spectrum--even more so. If he's not exhibiting this at home, then it does like he's over-stimulated. Can he go fewer days? Or would shorter days help--at least for a month or so?

    LOL on D's contribution. My husband has always been pretty good about attending parent-teacher conferences with me, and has even gone in my stead a time or two. The couple of problem teachers we've had over the years tended to shape right up when they had to face the two of us at once.

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  7. Have they looked at sensory issues, transitions, or circle time (you could always tell an autie in how they much hated circle time).

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  8. Poor wee man... he can't help himself yet. Hopefully when he gets a wee bit older he can tell you what upsets him.

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