Adjustments.

It's really not all that bad for me right now.  But I can no longer lift over 20 pounds on a regular basis, ever again.  Which really doesn't sound like a big deal, until you consider that two milk jugs and a purse put me over the limit.

That means someone always has to help me with shopping if I'm to get things home and put away before frozens melt and refrigerated stuff isn't very cold any more.  And considering that there are eight people in my family and I buy lots of stuff, someone big has to come along and push the cart while I walk about the store uselessly and direct him to pick up the stuff I want.

And my new limits mean someone always has to lift the vacuum and move the furniture about every week.

And when I unpack this year's summer clothes and put the winter ones away, someone has to get down each and every stupid bag for me.

Now when I go through boxes of school books, someone must be on hand to help with each. and every. stupid. box.  No more getting stuff done while people are off at work/school.

That means I sit around like a stupid prima donna all the time and have to ask everyone else to do MY work for me, but I don't get the benefit of being genuinely lazy.  

No more re-arranging furniture on a whim, going on trips alone, or really much of anything you think of as "completely independent."  Real yardwork, even, is completely over.  I'm not trying to be melodramatic (and I don't really feel that way, despite my itemized list here on the blog), but it really does put a great restriction on my life.   Not enough to be truly disabling in the classic sense of the word, but bahh.  Just enough to feel sorta useless.

Have you ever had to make adjustments like this, and make others understand and respect your new limitations?  Maybe this sounds silly, but it is the ordinary requests that are very hard for me.  For example, a room is becoming more crowded and new tables are needed to be brought in.  "Everybody" is supposed to go help move the tables and chairs.  I'm left doing nothing and looking like an inconsiderate bum OR explaining all about my medical history to strangers.

It's weird and I'm never really sure how to deal with that.  I don't want to be some old person who when people ask, "How are you?" go into the whole thing... but I also don't want to be all "everything is ok" and have people wonder why I'm so goshdarn lazy.

I think the hard part is that I will never get "better" and people don't want to hear that, or maybe think I say that for my own convenience.  I can't tell.

Happy Easter!

 

Meeting People in Heaven.

Do you believe in it?

Recently a beloved older man from the chess club passed away.  Emperor, Elf, and G were very sad to learn of this. "Poor Bill," Emperor kept saying.  I told him that the people I felt sorry for were his family.  Because Bill was a Christian and I know he is in a better place now with Bobby Fischer.

Patrick snorted.  "Not Bobby Fischer," he said raising one eyebrow.  "I'm thinking Bobby Fischer is somewhere else."

I dunno.  But I'm not the only one who thinks of all the people we'll meet in heaven. Here's an obituary about how a loved one is with "with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and Dale Earnhardt."

Elf Update

I haven't blogged about Elf in a while, so I thought I'd give an update.

Elf is in seventh grade and is doing pretty well in most of his classes.  He is extremely disorganized and doesn't always understand social cues very well, so he has an IEP.  That means he meets with other children who also have difficulty with social cues and they brainstorm answers to "What would you do if" questions.  (Hilarity ensues.  But it's guided hilarity at least, I suppose.) 

He also has a little extra help organizing his school binder and that sort of thing.  This spring break he's been working on all the science projects he "forgot" about over the last several weeks.  Though in all honesty, it hasn't been much of a spring break.  Really mostly I've been lying around and recovering and Elf and the gang have been watching too much tv, playing games (the older children learnt Rummy) and hanging out together.

Elf has also come occasionally to chess, but these last few months more often than not, he'd rather stay home.  I don't know if it is really because his little brother overshadows him a bit, but he says not, and he's really the sort of person who couldn't care too much for that level of competitiveness, so there you are.

One thing he just did today was make cinnamon raisin bread in his new breadmaker.  Here's a quick snapshot of his food and his pottery.  Unfortunately, he's also reaching that age where he does NOT want you to take his photograph. 

Yummers.

Midwest Junior Championship

Fifth place K-6 section!  Congrats, Emperor!

Why Not Common Core?

Looking for a concise way to tell friends why you oppose Common Core? Tell them, ObamaCore is a national education system designed to meet the demands of the federal government not the dreams of the child. What is tested is what is taught. What is taught is what is thought. America's foundation is built on freedom not conformity. -- Spunky Homeschool. 

Religious Freedom in Every Sphere

A Guest Post by Daja Gombojav.

Below is a letter I wrote on behalf of my dear friend and midwife, Brenda, who was arrested for exercising her faith as it applies to childbirth.  She has always felt it was her calling to assist women in birth.  She's a Traditional Christian (unlicensed) midwife, a fact that she has never hid.  In fact, she has openly advertised that fact, because there are those of us out there who are looking for just that--independent, religious centered birth on our own terms.  

We also started a petition on Brenda's behalf.  Even if home birth is not your thing, please sign it.  Even if you are not a Christian, please sign it.  At its core, it's not about home birth or theology.  It's about the essential right we all have to decide what we believe and how that is best lived out.  That is the right and responsibility of every individual (our "inalienable rights") and should not be infringed upon by the government.

 

SIGN HERE. 

 

To Whom It May Concern:

 

           My name is Daja Gombojav.  I'm the mother of seven, all born at home.  In six of the seven labors I have been attended by Brenda Capps.  My husband, Gana, is seminary educated with a Master's Degree in theology from Fuller Theological Seminary.  We have been missionaries and pastors in Mongolia.

 

            When we found out we were expecting our first child we specifically searched out a Christian midwife.  We were thrilled to be introduced to Brenda Capps and to learn she practiced under the Religious Exemption Clause.  We have always viewed birth as not only a spiritual, but a religious experience.  Only in the rare cases of emergencies is it a "medical" experience. 

           This understanding of birth as primarily religious can be found to span many, if not most religious thought and dogmas.  In Judaism, "A midwife’s role, among other things, is to encourage a birthing mother to "let go" and allow herself to become a conduit for this great Force to flow through. Trust in the natural process of labor and in a woman’s body to birth normally and safely is the hallmark of midwifery care. Every culture and religion has their own words and metaphors to describe their reverence and awe of this process. But for Jewish midwives, this reverence stems from an understanding that birth is G‑dly in nature. Their faith in birth is inexorably bound with their faith in G‑d." (Source)

 

            In Catholicism, birth is understood to be participating in the same creative power that took Eve from Adam's side.  St. Hildegard of Bingen, theologian and Doctor of the Church explains, "When birth is approaching, the vessel in which the child is enclosed is torn, and then comes the eternal energy that took Eve from Adam's side, and is present and turns upside-down all the corners of the shelter in the woman's body.  All the structures of the woman's body rush toward this energy, receive it and open up to it.  They do so until the child emerges.  Afterwards, they return to their previous state.  As the child emerges, its soul too feels the eternal energy that sent it, and meanwhile it rejoices." (St. Hildegard of Bingen in Causes and Cures)

 

            In Charismatic/Pentecostal Christian traditions, the belief that Jesus reversed the curse, thus lifting the pain of childbirth is in agreement with Romans 14:23 which says that anything not from faith is sin.  In a now classic Christian childbirth text, Supernatural Childbirth, author Jackie Mize writes, "When I refer to supernatural childbirth, I’m talking strictly about being able to conceive and to have babies with a pregnancy free from nausea, morning sickness, pain, moodiness, depression and without fear of any kind; then going through the entire labor without pain, and through the delivery without stitches and anesthetic. I’m talking about using the Word of God to overcome, change and make things better." (Supernatural Childbirth, Jackie Mize)

 

           In Reformed Christian traditions, the understanding of birth being religious extends to conception and pregnancy also.  God is seen as completely Sovereign.  He alone opens and closes the womb.  "Each time a human baby is born, another image bearer of God is brought into the world, thereby making each birth a very spiritual event.  Birth may be a commonly-occurring experience, but that does not make it common, mundane, or insignificant.  It is miraculous.  Isn't that how God is sometimes?  Even His own son's coming to earth seemed "insignificant."  A baby born in a stable to a poor family is far from the regalia appropriate for our Messiah, the Son of God.  It almost seems like He chooses to allow Himself to be "hidden" in the most obvious of places." (AboveRubies) 

             For our family, we are always striving to live fully integrated lives where our faith informs every aspect of our day-in-and-day-out.  This includes our family planning (or lack thereof), pregnancy, birth, post-partum and the way we raise our children.  Because this is our outlook on family, we believe that childbirth is an expression of our faith.  It is not a medical event that should be managed by men. It is an act of the Sovereign God. 

           When planning for our births a few things are essential: We want to give birth in an atmosphere of faith, peace, and love.  We don't invite anyone who will bring fear, control, or worry.  Everyone present must be in agreement with our objectives of a birth without pain, fear, or intervention.  I want someone who will encourage me to surrender to the Power that is eternal and available.

 

            This is why we have chosen Brenda to attend us in childbirth six times.  The role she fills is not medical, it is spiritual.  She acts as a sort of guide between a woman and the innate power she has at her disposal to give birth.  Had Brenda not been practicing her art the way she has been, we would have searched out another Christian direct entry midwife.  If we were unable to find one we would have chosen to birth unattended.  That's how strongly we feel about our children not being born into a medical environment--whether that be at the hospital or recreated at home by a caregiver who doesn't truly trust birth.

 

            We count ourselves extremely blessed to live in a country and state where women have the choice to manage their reproduction according to their own conscience and religion.  We realize that many places the government tries to intervene to tell families how, when and where their children can/should be born.  We pray that California is not headed down that road.  It will be to the detriment to all of us.

 

            We stand wholeheartedly with Brenda Capps and her practice under the Religious Exemption Clause. 

Sincerely,

Daja Gombojav

Brenda and my sixth baby.

If you believe in the First Amendment, if you value your Religious Freedom, if you think that parents should decide for themselves how, where, and with whom they birth their babies, PLEASE sign the petition and make your voice heard.