Let's face it. One of the really hard things about having a special needs child is this thought that he will never have a normal life.
Oh, we have great kids. Yeahh, we would never trade them in for the whole world and blah blah blah. Think parents of standard issue children would look at our "giftings" and go, wish I coulda had some of THAT in my life and I would sure trade my kid in? HELLO, the "I wouldn't trade my kid for anything" issue only comes up when we have a problem going on. No one else has to even feel the need to justify that they love their children as they are.
These parents can drop their children off at a friend's house and LEAVE. Oh, nevermind that. Their children HAVE friends who invite them over, how about we start there?
Not trying to grouse here. Just being real with you: it's not fun. "Love my children/ cherish them as they are" does not equal "fun and glad things are the way they are." My kids are missing out on a lot of things.
Woodjie pooped maybe twice in the toilet. He's nearly five. Don't think I'm doing the happy hoedown every time I have to wipe up crap and celebrating how "awe-tism is awe-some." And he's climbing the walls and throwing toys around before I can even bag up his poop, put the laundry in and wash my hands. Ok? And sometime soon the other kids are going to start making his life miserable when he poops in class. Barring a miracle, he'll never go to regular school. Never sit in a waiting-type restaurant. Never have a best friend who personally invites him over. Never play in the school band.
It's not fair! It really isn't. Yes, I'm in the neurodiversity bandwagon club thing, but that doesn't mean I'm all happy about how great my kid has it. I wish he could do all those fun things. So when I read stories like this, I understand where the mom is coming from.
Sure, band auditions cull out those kids who aren't talented/don't bother to practice. Go do something else if you're no good at it.
But I feel sometimes kids like mine get culled out of everything. Even the autism therapy groups often specify Asperger's only. Yeah, thanks for that...