30 April 2008

Credentials, Anyone?

http://elsieandjoedeluxe.blogspot.com/2008/04/homeschooling-parents-and-teachers.html

Thanks to Sunniemom for linking this post in her blog. "Elsie Deluxe" claims to have been a teacher in school and a homeschool mom as well. She states that she feels the two jobs are only just barely similar and that the two groups (teachers and h-s parents) misunderstand one another because they perceive their jobs as being alike when they really aren't. That's actually an excellent point. She goes on to say that teachers should respect that homeschoolers don't need certification because they know their children and don't need to manage a class of differing learners, etc. etc. But on the other side, "it seems that some homeschooling parents believe that because they deeply understand that they don't need a credential to teach their kids, the credential must be worthless.

It's not.

Teachers really do know some things about teaching that parents who teach their kids at home don't know. Because they have to. It's completely different work."

Ok, I'm tempted to get completely snarky and say, yeah, they need to know the proper way to do things like showing the kids how to navigate from one class to the next in four minutes when literally 568 others are trying to do the same thing, or how to discuss oral sex with a class of 30 children "professionally." Or demonstrate to them what to do when their best friends start smoking pot. I'm tempted. But she *does* have a point that managing children whose behaviour probably leaves much to be desired is something for which a little extra training may be helpful. She glosses over this in the comment section, implying she didn't want to fully address it so that homeschoolers don't have a bashing point.

Teachers have a hard job in this respect, and I can't say I'd bash them for failure to "control" students when their disciplinary measures are extremely limited. I think homeschoolers and public school educators do have a common interest in some sort of law and order in the classroom, because we all know public education isn't going anywhere anytime soon. Like it or not, the children who sit in public school classrooms today will make up the majority of voting adults tomorrow. We have an interest in lobbying for good classroom discipline...

And I can't say that "dealing with pompous administrators" would be something I'd be prepared to do as well as a teacher, either. Maybe some training needed for that, too. I'm sure a lot of parents can be extremely "challenging." And maybe a little off-topic, but I feel I need to insert here that I respect the fact that public school teachers work.

And they work HARD, folks.

I know some in "real life," too. You'd be surprised at how many have taken me aside and told me that they would really prefer to be at home with their own children, educating them.

I've also seen others make snide little comments about how they're "certified" and so they are able to handle the "whatever" we're talking about just then. And you know very well that that person's comment is meant to say in a backhanded way, "And you CAN'T handle these things, homeschool mom, because you're not certified and special and intelligent like meeeee..."

Give it a rest.

I suppose more telling than the blog post itself were some of the comments. "In general I see anti-credentialism (is that a word?) as a more socially acceptable form of anti-intellectualism." This intelligentsia-type person needs to be thwacked on the head with my little Communist Red Book. (Just kidding! But I had to say it! Does this guy really think I'm part of some new Cultural Revolution?)

Another writes that, "posts like this one make me think that politically homeschoolers need to be able to work with teachers' unions rather than assume they are the enemy. If we understood each other better, we could work together to fight some of the political decisions that are really causing problems." And while we're at it, Christians should make nice with those lions in the coliseum. They might not want Christianity to be an option, but it's nothing personal. The unions are just hungry for ALL the power and ALL the children. They want the arena to themselves, but if we just understood each other better, everything would be all right-y.

Wow. Maybe I'm not understanding the full tone and context of the commenters. I surely hope that I am not, because if folks in public education really think this way for the most part we're in big trouble.

Outdoors







The four younger children and I went on a walk today near our house. I packed a "picnic" lunch to take on the way. J and S did very well in the stroller. I was pleasantly surprised! These are pictures of Elf and Emperor on a recent walk with D. These photographs are for illustrative purposes only. Results not typical. Your walk may not achieve the same result. Consult with a physician before undertaking any physical activity. Known side effects of walking include, but are not limited to, fresh air intake, sunshine, and happiness.

29 April 2008

Scary Photos!







G took apart his little "eyeball" necklace for comic effect. The other boys insist that they are scary as well. Please try not to get too terrified, because they really DO want you to read my blog and see their pictures.

Buggy Family Secret Revealed!


My toaster is in the living room. The breads are piled haphazardly on the side of the kitchen the ants have not found. Yet. We sweep and clean and wipe. They are still here. They take a long time to eat the poison we've laid out for them. I wish they would DIE already. Die, die, die! Sometimes I take a wet paper towel and smoosh them, hoping to eliminate their trail. It doesn't work, though it is a bit satisfying to see their twitching little bodies go into the trash. (Yes, I'm mean that way. It's *my* kitchen.) Elf cannot wash his hands at this sink any more because he is too short to reach the faucet without leaning against the counter. Yuck.

28 April 2008

Homeschooling With Lotsa Kids

Sometimes, you wonder if it will all get done when you have smaller children. It will all get done. It just might take you a long, long time.

Now, I'm not going to lie to you. Sometimes it feels as though the little ones are out to sabotage your beautiful plans for a learning-filled homeschool day. It's almost as though the tiny children are colluding together and timing their poopie diapers for *just that moment* an older child is about to grasp a concept. Their screamy-grumpy times are also out-of-sync enough so that there is no way you can coordinate a quiet moment. These little kids are strategists, all right. Consider the evidence:

**********************************************************************
Exhibit A: The Woodjie Pumpkin. Sure, J looks awfully cute in the picture. Happy, even. That's because I've given in and given the child EVERYTHING he wanted. All the toys are strewn across the floor, snacks have been doled out and I've read him three books. Thanks, Mom.

One way our homeschool works is by appeasing the barbarians and giving them bribes to be quiet. The books. The snacks. I've even gone so far as to give crayons and paper. Yes, I have.




Exhibit B: The Girl. This one is more sinister in her approach. Bribes do not work on this one. She is more manipulative in her attack on homeschooling. Oh, she'll be so good-natured and quiet and sweet. Can she have a cuddle? Mmm.. A bottle? Mmm... Snuggle me one more minute. You don't *really* need to teach those multiplication tables today, do you? I'm only young for a little while, Mom!
*
Yes, it's true. Some days we will get quite a bit done and I'll be astounded at the quiet. Other days you might as well be happy with a half-hour here and there. Most of the time, however, I've employed a method that homeschool moms have used throughout the ages. It's called, "teach when everyone is calm."
*
It sounds simple, and it is if you don't let things like laundry and housework detour you. It involves training your homeschoolers to do worksheets and other problems while you are attending the smaller children. It also involves teaching your homeschoolers to drop everything and listen to you give instruction when you have a free moment. Your homeschoolers presumably will learn to switch gears more effectively as you employ this method in your school.
*
In public schools, switching from one activity to another like that is called "transition." It's actually a skill they teach their special-needs kids in the classroom. Lunch is over, and now it's time for math. Math is over, and now it's time for reading.
*
In our homeschool, it's a little more complicated than that. Math isn't over, but put down those worksheets a second while I teach you your Social Studies. When you get a chance, I want you to do pages 19 and 20 in your Social Studies book. But now that I have a free minute, let's talk about your mathematics. Ok, now it's time for you to finish your math and Social Studies while I attend your brother.
*
I'm back. It's English time! You can do that other stuff later. Whoops, I'm leaving halfway through the lesson for a sec, but go do your math and Social Studies while I get S a bottle...
*
Eventually it all *does* get done.









Yay for Meee...

I can now proudly state that I am *only* 50 pounds over the "really really really about to die from being so fat" category on the BMI chart. I have lost weight to the point that I am now at my pre-pregnancy weight from baby S. So I have lost 27 pounds in three months. I was kinda hoping all 98 pounds would be gone by now, but I knew that was unrealistic. I hoped it anyway.

Hoping doesn't make my bottom any smaller, though. You would think that having lots of little kids would somehow burn it right off of you but unfortunately the opposite is true, and it's almost impossible to get more than two steps in on the treadmill without at least one baby crying or a homeschooler trying to wave a workbook in front of you.

I am trying to encourage myself with the idea that I will be down to the "moderately disgustingly obese" category in two years.

27 April 2008

Baby S is Three Months Old Now.


She is very thin and doesn't have enough pink stuff with flowers in her wardrobe.

Cure or Acceptance?

This isn't along the lines of accepting that your child is a girl rather than a boy (or vice versa) or learning to deal with the fact that he'll be very tall. Autism is a no-fun thing, guys. Sure, there can be advantages to the affected person such as being able to tune out a lot of social stimuli when working on a problem. There is no cloud without a silver lining. But I, for one, would prefer the cloud not be there.

The debate over "cure" or "acceptance," I think, is really a matter of semantics. No matter how hard we try, we never really have achieved either. In our heart of hearts, we know our autistic child will always be different and we also know we will never fully accept autism in the same manner in which we would accept a child's "boyness" or "girlness."

Kristina Chew, in her Autism Vox blog, writes this about the acceptance/cure debate:

Perhaps, over time, a parent learns to perform a kind of dance between encouraging a child to learn and knowing when to let a child be as he or she is? Perhaps, whatever gets said about “cure” and “recovery,” at some point you think, difference is difference. I’d rather Charlie not screech in public, but I am glad that he’s got that desire and drive to express himself.

http://www.autismvox.com/hope-starts-with-acceptance

She writes that she had gotten to this point after intensive ABA therapy with Charlie to the tune of *40 hours a week.* Have to interject a twinge of jealous feeling here. She has one child and can intensively pour everything into him. She KNOWS she's done everything possible and this is the way it is. Is "acceptance" easier then? I wonder. Then again, her child has far fewer "opportunities to work out conflict" with siblings LOL! Only think what he's missing. ;]

Yes, this was yet another "acceptance verus cure" post all about autism. It's my blog. Maybe I'll post about it again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next day...

26 April 2008

D Plants a Tree


Neither of us are great gardeners, but we felt we needed to do SOMETHING to replace the over 90-foot tall pin oak that we had to have removed a few years ago. Our new addition: a four-foot tall Macintosh apple tree. We hope it lives. D followed the directions that came with the plant and it occupies a sunny spot in our front yard.

Yardwork... "Before."

Today's task outside was too monumental to be accomplished in one day. In fact, I don't really hope to accomplish it. We have a large "rock garden" occupying our hill. I pull weeds I don't like and leave the ones I enjoy. Occasionally I will buy a plant and hope it lives in the rock garden. Usually it does not. I have tried to plant pumpkins in the rock garden. They do not grow. Corn also does not grow. Some vines grow. Dandelions and trees grow. Grasses grow here, but not in other areas of the yard we would LIKE for the grasses to grow. We have planted flowers and they grow, but only if you keep the weeds in check. Patrick and G both each earned $5 for their work in the yard today with me. We pulled weeds, raked leaves and cut small trees as close to the roots as we could. Naturally the rock garden is in worse shape than usual because I have just had two children very close together and have been unable to give it the attention it needs. Thankfully, we do not live in a subdivision with picky gardening rules, and can pretty much do as we please.


Patrick pulling weeds.
G was a little cold this morning before he got into the task for a bit.





We needed to move this bunch of concrete blocks out of the way before D could mow. For some reason, the previous owners left quite a few of these behind. Most of them are broken and not very pretty.








Yardwork... "After."

The leaves are at the bottom of the hill now.

Many of the weeds have been removed. You can see many remain, however. We removed dozens of small trees that grew over the last year or so in the rock garden.











Our yellow tulips will bloom soon.

Oklahoma Stuff!


********************************* ** **************** ******** *** The Stanleys came home with a bunch of things from the Zimms. The brochures are of places they've visited and we also got a puzzle. I think we'll be using some of the postcards to say hi to friends, and keep some for our homeschool files. Thanks, Zimms, for a really great visit! We can tell you guys really loved the Stanleys during their visit.

25 April 2008

Going for a Walk With Everyone.



We went on a walk recently and brought the entire family. You wouldn't think it would be a big ordeal, but it was. This was only our second outing as an entire family. It takes twice as much organization and planning with six children than it did with four. There are just more things to plan around, especially since the two youngest ones are so small and are constantly eating, pooping or napping. They're pretty special people, though. Can you tell baby J has just given S a kiss and is looking for "yayyy?" S has just learned to tolerate this constant kissing and poking.









Time to get little jackets and socks for babies. We had to bring extra cheerios and another blanket "just in case." We had to bring a cell phone and our keys. And D brought his camera and took all these lovely photos.


It was sunny outside, but still cool. We walked about a mile and a half around the area where we live. We didn't see many other people outside, however. Only a few joggers and dog-walkers were about. The trees and grasses are starting to wake up and turn green and things are beginning to bloom.




We had a very nice time once we were out! This is something we will have to try again soon.

24 April 2008

Rock Cycles


We're learning about rock cycles. What's in a rock? How did it get there? Only God can make rocks. After the initial act of creation, however, how are new rocks formed? How do older rocks make the transition into what we call "soil?"

There are three types of rocks. These are igneous, sedimentary, and metamorphic rocks. They are formed in different ways. I purchased a rock kit that has a few samples of each type of rock. This was very useful as we went through our science text, as well as in our readings from the library. Our library books frequently mention the "fact" that the world is several million years old. Perhaps hundreds of millions of years old, depending on the text. Our LIFEPACS from Alpha Omega, however, are quite clear about the divine origin of the world.


The boys have done the experiments listed in the book and they've all turned out horribly. I could not tell you why. In one experiment, we're to gather some pebbles and soil and shake it up. Allegedly, in a "few minutes" it should settle and we would be able to tell where the rocks land in the mixture. Top, middle or bottom layer? Well, it's been several days and the water is still murky. The pebbles are somewhere in the soil, but I could not tell you where. I could tell you that plant material generally floats, however.

In another experiment, we heated water and put salt into it. Then we set the string into the baby food jars as pictured. We're supposed to get salt crystals. I don't see any yet, and it has been several days. If you have a clue as to why our experiments don't work, let me know. It seems like a lot of effort just to find out that you haven't "proven" anything.

Later, we'll make a volcano with baking soda and vinegar. Who cares what that proves? It's going to be a lot of fun. We also have a rock field trip planned for late next month.

23 April 2008

Special Ed: Yucky, Icky, and Almost Contagious!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24245818

Now, I understand the concerns of parents who feel a lot of early intervention will help their children. I do! I'm a parent like that. Give my child all the help he can get early on, when their behaviours and attitudes are as malleable as they're going to be. (Note that I did not just say "malleable." As the mom of six kids, I have to clue you in to the fact that not every child is "malleable," even when an infant!)

We had tons of extra help for G when he was little. He went to a special preschool and has been receiving speech since he was three. He also receives occupational therapy and social skills help occasionally. To be honest, the help the school district offers isn't always the same help I'd like for my child. But I can't say that G hasn't been helped.

It didn't stop him from being placed into special education classes. These classes, I must admit, are a long sight better for him than the continual frustration everyone undergoes otherwise. And that includes his teachers and classmates as well as his family.

The way this article is written, you'd swear special education is some sort of horrible disease-y place that you'd never want to send your child. All those "dumb cooties" are catching and you don't want to be labelled! *Nice* people somehow magically *make* their children do well.

Nice, good parents who read to their children and don't have the TV blaring all the time are the ones who get to send their children to the best colleges. BAD parents are almost always to blame for a special ed placement:

"But researchers, including some influential with federal education officials, have long argued that students were getting stuck in special education not because of biological disabilities, but because of environmental factors.

They say their parents may have not read to them enough or allowed the children to stay home from school too often."

I suppose it never occured to these folks that the egg came before the chicken. We almost NEVER had the tv on with Patrick when he was a baby. Then we got Mr. G, who would bang his head and have all kinds of problems. You bet we turned on the tv more for him. If you don't have a child with these problems, you have no clue how bad things can get. I think turning the tv on is a long sight better than beating the kid in frustration. Judge not and all that. You can't tell from parent-reporting of tv hours if they've switched the set on BECAUSE they're frustrated and unable to cope, or if they're rotten folks who are just too lazy to actually raise their kids. I'm sure there are some of the latter out there, too, but boy, don't you sound high and mighty when you make blanket statements about parents who don't read "enough." How much is "enough?" You judgmental little swinedog! Did it ever occur to you that parents for the most part do the best they can??

So anyway...

We're going to give a little extra tutoring to kids in younger grades so that they avoid the horrible, awful, NOTHING WORSE THAN sort of fate than to be labelled as special ed:

"Identifying kids that need not be identified is the worst thing," Farmer said.

Yep, it is. Not teaching children how to use a condom or that homosexuality is ok. Not being bullied at school - that isn't the worst thing. Oh, if you have a bad home life and Papa beats you? Not the worst. The worst most horrible-est bad bad bad thing (you know, that's REALLY bad) is being labelled special-ed.

Um, thanks a lot. I'm sure that students with developmental disabilities and autism like G would appreciate the sentiment.

22 April 2008

FLDS is the NEW Fashion!

Wear a prairie skirt! Keep your hair long! Be modest! It's *so* in now.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24245576

The article tells us FLDS women look ugly on purpose so that their husbands aren't attracted to any one wife more than another. Oh, and so they don't get you awful outsiders a-lustin' after their bods. Why, we even have celebrity hairstylists talking about the fashionisticy of their hairdos! Their hairdo has something to say to you:

"It says 'I don't really care very much. I really don't have time to worry about the way that I look, because I have 20 children,'" Gibson said. "He's going from wife to wife to wife, so why should I look any better than the other ones?"

Oh, yeahrr. I *love* how these folks are portrayed as weirdos who all must dress exactly alike. They've obviously never been to their local middle school, where *every* teen girl must wear tight jeans and a tight shirt, preferably with some sort of sassy saying like, "Juicy and squeezable" or "I'm always right" or "you smell" on it. But see, FLDS women look like "throwbacks" from another time.

Hm.

These people also obviously haven't met many conservative Muslims, or United Pentecostals, or Hasidic Jews lately. They dress oddly, too. But see, they're not IN this year like the FLDS ladies:

"It's not outlandish to imagine the prairie look influencing today's styles, given that trends can come from unexpected places, and Sevigny is known as a style-setter. You can already find blouses with high necks and ruffles in stores, and puffed shoulders on short and long-sleeved shirts."

Can't wait to see one of these ladies on the cover of the fashion magazines this year! But *next* year, they'll be soooo out of fashion. Kind of like they were *last* year.

21 April 2008

At the Park With Emperor

D took Emperor to a walking park to spend a little time out alone with him. He took several nice pictures of their outing.

:] More Friends Are Always Good.

I've been tagged by the CajunChick (http://thesimplecajunlife.blogspot.com) to do a little meme. Usually I don't mind these but I don't tag anyone else. I know that if I do, the person I tag is going to be very upset and that will be *just* the week she has 253 other things to do and will be mad at me. SO if you wanna do this meme, go ahead and tag yourself with my blessing. If you leave a comment telling me you're doing this, I'll come mosey over and look at your post.

:]

I'm supposed to tell you three RANDOM things about myself. Random?? Things. Um...

1. It really bothers me when my front room or my kitchen is messy. I can handle messes almost anywhere else, but those two rooms have to be clean. I imagine my neighbours or the police or friends like to ring the bell at 6 p.m. or on the weekends... those are the times my house is untidy... and the secret of us'ns being white trash will be revealed to all. I just know that that is *all* anyone else thinks about or wants to discuss in their daily conversation. Mrs. C's front room. Did you know I saw not one, but TWO PAIRS of shoes out of place yesterday? And that there was unsorted mail on that front table?? Oh, my, you don't say...

BUT... if my front room is clean and I have my candle burning to mask the "Eau de PooPoo Diaper" smell that sometimes happens 'round these parts, the visitor will see the clean room, smell cherries in the air and blissfully depart. RIGHT???!!

2. I am so obese that there isn't even a category for it. The BMI chart just says things can't get much worse. I am ON the chart though. Have you noticed there are no pictures on the blog of me from the shoulders down? Good reason for that. Maybe when I lose 50 more pounds and am only in the "overweight" category I may appear on the blog in person.

3. I have been a Christian for almost 13 years.

4. None of these things are very random, though.

Jezebel: The Untold Story of the Bible's Harlot Queen

book by Lesley Hazleton - a review

In this book, Jezebel is proud, regal and triumphant in the face of the intolerant enemy. She worships her many gods with the same passion and zeal as folks like Elijah worshipped his. She's not a bad fellow, you know. She's just *drawn* that way in the Bible.

And you see, folks who wrote the Bible like to put their own little spin on things. Let's face it: the God of Elijah is not a very nice guy. He's jealous and mean and nasty. Why, look how he treated the Israelites because of Ahab's allowing a temple to other gods and other petty sins. Really, why should God be so picky? I mean, everyone ELSE around-about was doing stuff like that. It was a great political move for Ahab to marry Jezebel. Why shouldn't he have been kind enough to build his new wife a temple to her gods? You know, why can't we all be tolerant?

"This is where it begins: the binary mind-set. Either/or. You're either with me or against me; either a believer or an infidel; either good or evil. There is no middle ground. The world separates into black and white, with not a shade of gray, let alone real color. Elijah issues the classic challenge, heard everywhere from Islamist madrasas and hardline yeshivas to evangelical seminaries; you're one of us, or one of them. Merely to tolerate the existence of other faiths is to be a dangerous weakling; it is tantamount to being an infidel yourself. Believe, or be damned." (p. 90)

This one-God gets awfully upset sometimes. And He takes it all out on the wrong people. Do you think all the nobles went hungry or died of thirst during the three-year draught? Nope. It was the common folks. I have to hand it to the author; she really does raise a good point on that one. Doesn't it stink when "good" people suffer for the "bad" someone else does?

I know the churchy answer is that there are no good people. We all deserve Hell but the wonderful gift of God was Jesus etc. etc. etc. Try that theology on a parent watching her children slowly die of dehydration. It doesn't really work.

The book is written in such a way that we follow the author in looking at the places the biblical events were supposed to have taken place. Gorgeous palaces lie in ruins and dogs patrol Elijah's birthplace. I'd have to say it's an interesting read just for that. She puts an interesting if secular spin on the biblical events surrounding Elijah and Jezebel.

I wouldn't buy the book, though.

20 April 2008

Holy Sabbath Soda

Well, a couple weeks back, Elf won a drawing for some snacks from church. He came home with some popcorn, some soda and brownies. To be eligible, you need to remember an offering, remember your Bible verse, and behave yourself. Patrick doesn't like the idea because he thinks it's just like gambling. Well... I don't think the church leadership means it that way. I talked to him about things we make a big deal about and things we just let go. OK, he's not going to make a big deal about his moral convictions... but he's going to find sneaky ways to kind of let you know what's on his mind. Sigh.

Happy?

Would you take away your child's autism if you could? Even if that meant your child would be fundamentally different?

Yup. I would.

I've had great difficulty blogging on autism this month. I would *like* to be able to talk about how much of a blessing my children with autism can be. It's true. They're blessings. But this month, G has had extreme difficulty with his behaviour. He tends to think in very black and white terms... You are either the greatest, most special mom on the whole face of the planet or, if you have taken his games away and confined him to his room...

You are Adolf Hitler. You are a JERK! I hate you. That's your new name; it's JERK. You're stupid and you're ABUSING ME! AAAAAA! AAAAA! AAAAA! Abusing me! AAAAA!

(And here I think about what my neighbours think. G bangs on the walls and the pole in the basement, which makes a loud bunch of sounds. Sure sounds like someone's getting the poop beaten out of him from outside.)

At this point, there is NO point talking to him or administering consequences like taking away stuff or whatever. No point. He is absolutely out of it. You are a jerk. There is nothing you can say or do at this point to be a good person again. Nevermind that you are absolutely rational, and console yourself that at least *this time* you haven't raised your voice, despite being sorely tempted... Nevermind that the reason the kid got sent to his room was for something that a "neurotypical" kid woulda been grounded a month for pulling.

You are abusing him.

AAAAA!! AAAA! Why won't anyone listen to me!?? I'm being ABUSED because of YOU and you're being a JERK! AAAAA! (bang bangbangbangbang bang... bang... bang bangbang continues for 45 minutes...)

Hey, some other time we can talk about "why medication isn't always a bad idea" or "why sometimes good parents don't seem to be doing a good job." But meanwhile, I'll leave you with this thought: I would rather get rid of every last symptom of autism. Sure, I would no longer be the best mom in the world sometimes. But I wouldn't be Hitler sometimes, either. And I just hate it when I'm Hitler, you know?

OK, now all y'all autism parents who think your kids are just fine with their autism go ahead and bash me. But I'm allowed to have a preference, since we're talking hypothetically.

I have a really big "preference" for getting rid of autism if we can. I think G and I would BOTH be happier that way.

Please Visit My Friend

http://garbanzotoons.blogspot.com

Take a look at his latest post; I'm not sure how to link it. Um, if you think it's bad to marry off your daughter when she's 15 or 16, you ain't seen nothing yet.

The question of the day is, what constitutes pedophelia in Islam? From the posts it looks like there is no such thing. You could injure a BABY and it would be okie-dokie with the Khomenis.

I sure hope this is a hoax, but I'm afraid it might not be. Warning you, there is disturbing content.

My Haircut is Cute.


My mom did a good job cutting my hair! I look so grown-up in my froggy shirt, too. I am still not talking, but I am a very important part of my family and "somehow" manage to make my wishes known. Did I mention that I'm cute? Come on, admit that I'm really cute.

I'm Not Old, But...

I don't understand technology. I think the most *advanced* thing I can use in this world is Blogger. If they were to change how to upload pictures, or if we were to purchase a new computer or camera, I'd be totally lost.

I learned how to upload pictures this way: D showed me all the steps to take and I WROTE THEM DOWN. Then, every time I wanted to upload pictures, I took my list out. It had things like "open bottom thingy of camera" and "put memory thing in top slot thing of computer" written down for my future reference. Now that I've loaded pictures up many times, I can do it without referring to my list. I know which things go where.

It seems like "everyone else" knows how to do these things by some strange collective human instinct. Like the Borg, maybe. I, however, am genuinely not sure what the difference between and MP3 player and an Ipod would be. I keep thinking of MPs as people in the army that put you in prison, and pods as things with little peas in them. I know that these are really "expensive gadgets I can't afford, and couldn't figure out how to use even if I could," but those are the images that go through my mind when I hear about MP3s and Ipods.

Looking up the definition of these things does not help me either. Just today, I wanted to find out what a "WiFi" was. And why does it come in a blanket? Where would I see one? I know that HiFi is a grooovy sound system and supposed to be very high-tech (years ago, anyway). Maybe it's the same sort of thing only they upgraded the first letter? Maybe a new first letter with each version that came out... that would make sense. Let's look it up! Well, the wikipedia people decided not to show a picture of the blanket, and their definition was NO HELP to me:

The purpose of Wi-Fi is simple: Hide complexity by enabling wireless access to applications and data, media and streams. This is translated to the language of physicists, engineers, technicians and IT users as follows:

enable access to information easily
ensure compatibility and coexistence
get rid of cabling and wiring
get rid of switches, adapters, plugs and connectors.

The evolution has only just begun.

"The evolution has only just begun???!!" I'm in big trouble now! I don't understand what "it" is in the first place and now it's only just begun! How is one to even live in a world like this? What does this definition mean? I'm supposed to get along better with my neighbour if I get a WiFi and have better coexistence?? What what what???! There should be a requirement that definitions on wikipedia be written understandably.

I would wonder if I'm part of this "digital divide," but it isn't like I don't have access to technology. I just don't undertand what I have. I've studied my cell phone manual and I'm *supposed* to be able to "text" and do all kinds of strange things. I'm supposed to have a message system. But if you call me on my cell phone, you'd better hope I figure out how to answer it on time because I have a lot of messages I can't figure out how to check. Hopefully they weren't important.

19 April 2008

Flat Stanley Plays Footy!

















Hi Elf & Emperor!





The Flat Stanleys had a great day today. They had their first lesson in playing ‘Aussie Rules’ Football.

The Stanleys were very excited to meet Jack’s friend today, and even more excited to discover that Jack and his friend were going to spend the morning teaching them how to kick the football. First Jack demonstrated what to do (the Stanleys watched very closely) and then the Stanleys had a try themselves. They loved playing football!

After they had worn themselves out running around, Jack decided to treat the Stanleys to a traditional Australian ‘Footy lunch’ – a meat pie with tomato sauce! The Stanleys thought this was great!

Paddle Steamers!
















Hi Elf & Emperor!

The Stanleys spent this afternoon visiting the Paddle Steamers in the town of Echuca in Northern Victoria. The Port of Echuca was once a very busy inland port, with goods being transported up and down the river to different parts of the country. The boats here in the Port still run on steam, powered by huge wood fires on board the boat. It is a very hot and hard job for the workers on the boat who keep the fire stoked so that the boat will keep running (especially in summer when the temperature gets very high)!

The Stanleys also had a look at the Thong Tree whilst they were visiting the Paddle Steamers. Thongs are very popular for people to wear in Australia. The Stanleys thought that you might have thongs at home in the USA but they weren’t sure what you called them.

We will write again soon!

Love from Jack and Annie xx
Website:

Bin Laden Urges More Suicide Bombings

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i32362

In a message released on al Jazeera Osama bin Ladin has urged Muslims to support the establishment of a Palestinian state. In the recording he said "Every Muslim has a duty to work towards a viable independent Palestinian state and the best way to achieve that is to blow yourself up in a marketplace in Karbala. Trust me on this."

-- I've enjoyed reading various articles on this spoof website.

Aussie Beach Time! Sent by Kim in Tasmania, Australia.





























Today we went to the beach. The Stanleys had lots of fun. The Stanleys liked being buried in the warm sand and really liked building a sandcastle. We wrote "Flat Stanleys" in really big letters in the wet sand. On the way home we stopped and bought pizza mmm...

Bringing Garbage Home

Some people up the street were throwing this table away. It was in pretty bad shape and one of the legs was off. I've glued the leg back...