30 April 2011

St. James Chess Tournament



Emperor won in the grades 1-3 division of the St. James Chess Tournament today. Our piano now has more trophies than candles. It is now time to ask about sending Emperor in to play K-6 or even high schoolers next time, what do you think?

Homeschool Chess Lessons

Chess can cost you practically nothing, which makes it the perfect homeschool elective. I've found several boards for sale in secondhand stores and garage sales. But I did break down and purchase a standard tournament board after we got into the game for a bit and began playing in tournaments.

A simple library book or three can help you learn which pieces move and how. Ages ago, we bought some sort of chess disk to play on the computer. Software isn't very expensive. For that matter, you can play for free online at http://www.chesskid.com/ or http://www.chess.com/. We bought "premium" memberships in chesskid after we tried it out for a while and figured that it was something we would really use. There are videos and tactics exercises galore.

One book I found pops up for sale frequently with homeschool curriculum providers is Starting Chess. My nine-year-old, Emperor, took a look at it lately and declared it far too simple. Which to me means that it likely is a truly "starting chess" sort of a book that most anyone would find understandable. Currently we are working through the Simon and Schuster Pocket Book of Chess. I'd recommend it for a middle school through adult beginner. It contains some basic tactic puzzles and teaches algabraic notation (the current standard) after a brief introduction of the pieces and their moves.

There are a good number of youtube videos and websites devoted to chess and chess tactics as well.

We've found there is a chess club and a chess league not too far from where we live. We've been playing at the league level for about 6 months and now we are ready to try going to the club each week. I don't think we'll ever get as ambitious as our friends who are going to NATIONALS this week in Dallas (Good luck, S family!!), but I think we'll always enjoy the game.

29 April 2011

Juicy Watermelon

Cupcakes skillfully decorated by Elf and Emperor. I got the idea from little mini-cakes in the local grocery store. I had just made a couple extra little plates up when the mailman came by with homeschooling stuff. I was *so* glad we could brighten his day with a little sweetness. He has been our mailman since we moved in 14 years ago and we sure appreciate his careful driving and accurate delivery. :)

Elf at School

At school, everyone is nice. No one is ever mean. The only thing that is very bad is the angry art teacher. Mr. McC told the class that there had better not be another "massacre" in the art class before he took them over. He told Elf that it is best that he not everr knowww what happened in art class before he got there. Angry Art Teacher told all the students they had best shut their mouths and not talk.

Elf said he was veryy quiet and made a cutout picture of some kind in that art class for the school art fair, did you know that? That was fun. Art class is *great.* Maybe the art teacher is great, too, but had a bad day because of the "massacre" that happened before. Mom, what is a "massacre?"

In class, sometimes they play games. Elf won a grape pop! It was super cold because it had been in the freezer. Mom doesn't usually give grape pop. School is *great!*

Every week, they get to watch a movie. This one was a ghost story and a lot of the kids were screaming and scared. Was Elf? Welll, let him just say that it *was* sort of a scary story with a surprising part to it. He got to eat his lunch by the screen. Mom doesn't let him mix up his movies with his meals.

They also have "PE" in school. They will not let him run or play because of his broken bones. He has to stand or sit to the side with a couple of other children who are also not allowed in PE. That part of school *would* be great, but isn't right now. Elf is sure he can do bunches of pushups when he is allowed.

Elf's teacher is also really *great.* He can teach better than his mom! Mr. McC says this part of his starting school is called a "honeymoon" and that we should enjoy it while we can. :)

28 April 2011

Bullying?

When someone dies, everyone wants to know why.

The news stories seem to indicate that Phoebe Prince was very wild and unstable. She apparently stole boyfriends and didn't understand why people wound up hating her for her manipulation. It appears she had mental problems and her mother, on at least one occasion, left her alone at night. (Trouble, of course, ensued.)

Phoebe later killed herself after the chickens came home to roost with interest. Now the "bullies" are up on criminal charges and the grieving if somewhat inept mom is Scot-free.

It isn't nice to call someone an Irish slut. Or a whore. Or a c-word. But at the same time, I could picture myself at 15 or 16 saying that sort of thing to someone if she were sleeping around with my boyfriend and some other fellows. I could also easily imagine getting together with friends and snickering about her and/or gossiping. Spreading rumours about her on facebook and just about everywhere else. I'm not saying it's RIGHT. But I'd like to think it isn't criminal, particularly as it's somewhat instigated behaviour.

Bullying isn't always very clear-cut. Often the person bullied has contributed in some way to the problem. And sometimes what appears to be bullying on the surface is tit for tat sort of stuff that escalates. It would be easy to defend against libel if Prince were a public figure; the kids would simply show that what they have said is TRUE. Chick is sleeping around? Check. And is Irish? Check. Um, "Irish slut" would sorta fit there...

So I'm very concerned that everything seems to be labelled as "criminal bullying" now. If the other teens had threatened bodily injury to the "Irish slut," or in some other way done something a reasonable person would find frightening, that would be more in line with what I feel ought be prosecuted. If you've seen bullying, REAL bullying, where kids are smacked around and constantly belittled for things they can't help such as a disability, you'd understand that having people just plain old hate you and call you names because of stupid crap YOU DID, that YOU KNOW is stupid and wrong, should NOT count. "Bullying" should really imply some sort of defenselessness on the victim's part or some sort of threat or intimidation.

Now, wait. I'm not saying that these other kids were all nice or that nothing should be done about their mean-ness. If it's true that there were several yelling at her and throwing stuff, punish them for THAT. Not criminal charges for her death.

It just seems everyone wants to blame the schoolyard "bully" without looking at the entire picture. When someone dies, it shouldn't erase every blemish of the character of that person. It is considered impolite to speak ill of the dead but I think somebody probably has to to defend some living teenagers who are probably going through their own special hell right now.

The truth is that Phoebe's actions (or those of anyone who actually kills him/herself) were likely either borne of selfishness or mental illness. I would be inclined to think the latter.

This kid *should* have been ostracised for the way she acted. Not screamed at and having stuff thrown at her, but hello... you just CANNOT act the way she allegedly did and not expect a social consequence. The young lady should have learned a lesson from this ostracism, vowed never to have sex again before marriage, and apologized nicely to all the affected parties. The mother should have then taught her wayward daughter that yes, everyone will now shun you throughout your high school years. This is the price you pay for acting like a jerk. Stop acting like one.

Maybe I'm being too blunt. But this was a real child who did something horrible, drastic and wayyyy worse than what the so-called bullies could ever perpetrate. Her parents either let her get out of control, or needed and were unable to obtain enough help for their daughter. If I were the defense attorney for these kids, I'd want to know what the hey about why the parents aren't being prosecuted for negligence. You don't just leave a mentally ill and sexually active teen alone overnight unless someone cuts your leg off and you need to drive yourself to the emergency room, yk? But it may just be that these are simply fallible human parents who desperately wanted mental health help for their little girl and were unable to find any that really made any difference.

People aren't all good or evil. They just seem to be drawn that way in the news...

27 April 2011

Elf Goes to School

I took about 50 pictures but since I got there early, I didn't hold up the dropoff line. ALL the pictures in which he is facing the camera wound up with his eyes squeezed tight, so I am posting the pic of what I saw as I was getting ready to drive away... *sniff*... Goodbye, Elf. He says he will miss me, but I don't think he will. Do you know who is very sad? Emperor. I've already played (and lost) two chess games and he's been online "battling" other players for a while now. I'm going to have to pull him away soon and tell him it's time for other lessons. He will have a hard time doing his schoolwork without his best friend. Thankfully for him, Elf will only go half days for a while, so math and science are done at home. And chess. DO NOT forget chess.

26 April 2011

Carnival of Homeschooling!

Check it out at the Corn and Oil blog! There is a wide variety of posts this week; everything from egg shell art to owls are covered. :)

25 April 2011

The Trip to Holland.

I know you've heard the story.

You get ready for a trip to Italy, and you learn Italian, and you're all ready to eat the native foods and go to the native places and see the sights, but you get dumped off in Holland. Then somehow you're la-la-la-ing your way through Holland, clicking your wooden clogs happily and revelling in the blessings of tulips and windmills. This, or so the analogy goes, is just how it feels to have a "special" child, and aren't we all glad we're in Holland together?

Dang straight, I'm not. Twerp alert: I paid for Italy. I'm feeling gypped.

And gimme a break. Don't even tell me that the second you got off that plane, that you wouldn't be yelling at every single ticket agent, the pilot, the stewardesses, the radar tower people, God and some random puppy that got in your way that day. (No, you'd kick the puppy. You're just that mad.) I'm telling you, I'd have the most colossal temper fit you'd ever seen, right in the airport. It would look something like this, but you have to picture this scene with a middle-aged fat white woman roly-polying all over the ground and snotting everywhere.

But the analogy isn't really a fair one. Because really, you're IN ITALY but no longer able to speak Italian with the people who surround you. You can no longer eat the foods you wanted to eat or go to the places you wanted to see as a parent. Sure, you can love your little Dutchman and pinch his little Campbell's soup kid cheeks, and you can rejoice in the fact that your child is a gift from God. And you can yodel with him or whatever it is that those Dutch people do. (I know they don't yodel... that was just me trolling for comments by being provocative.)

That doesn't mean that when your child doesn't speak and the other kids the same age in the church nursery are using the potty and giving an entire monologue, that you don't feel jealous. And angry. Why are we all working so hard, and things are still difficult?

It doesn't mean you don't want to smack some people upside the head, either. Do you know how aggravating it is to deal with stares and comments, knowing this is some horrible joke God is playing on your poor child? Here, you can be reasonably assured the know-it-all who advises you on child rearing in the local Wal-Mart hasn't had to deal with one stinkin' tenth of the problems you've been handling. And her kids don't have one stinkin' tenth of the obstacles to overcome your child does.

You feel jealous of the easy life those people have. You wish *you* had the easy life with *your* children and that you could be the one giving the stupid advice to Ms. Stupid and the Stupid Twins on checkout aisle 15. But nooooo. God puts all this on your family, and then you're supposed to suck it up and be gracious.

It isn't fair. Not that I'm doing so hot on the being gracious thing, and not that I'm doing so hot on even caring about not doing so hot on the being gracious thing. I just don't have any energy left to do that, you know?

Nesting

I think it's a female robin. She sits on the nest almost all the time now. I wonder what baby robins are like and whether we will be able to see anything from our deck, where this pic was taken with zoooom. Seems that now that we are studying birds, we will get to see some if not up close, at least nearby.

Crazy Comment Monday!

Dear friends, I'm enclosing a video I took yesterday of Jesus popping by to declare the end of the age. I know that it would not be possible for you to know of these things without social media, twitter, or facebook. Click LIKE if you think heaven's gonna be cool!

Arg. Well, I'm glad that at least later in the video interview, Franklin Graham clarified that we DON'T know how "every eye will see" Jesus returning to earth but that he IMAGINES that social media could be a part of that process. I don't know. The whole thing comes off as kinda nutty to me. Your thoughts?

23 April 2011

Reason #856 to Homeschool: Changed Outlook

Maybe I'm blogging this prematurely, but Elf will be going to public school part-time starting Wednesday. And I'm feeling pretty good about it.

But I do find that having homeschooled, I am changed. I know that at any time, all I have to do is send in a form that I'll be homeschooling Elf thankyouuuu, and I will never have to send him back. My husband was reluctant to allow Elf to homeschool, but he now understands that though there ARE some drawbacks to homeschooling for our family, there are some very big positives as well. And we've had the opportunity to enjoy those for 4 1/2 years.

I know that public school teachers can be wonderful and helpful and kind, and there are classes Elf will be taking that I don't have the time or patience for at home. But I know now that I don't NEED them. I would, at this point, LIKE for them to be a part of Elf's life. Everyone at the new elementary (I demanded a different one than the closet-locking one, you betya) seems so kind and concerned that Elf have a smooth transition. I can't tell you how many phone calls and caring questions I've had about how best to acclimate him.

I think that going to school part-time will be very good for him. But I also think it is very good for ME as a parent to know that I'm not just stuck with whatever I get. I'm actually very impressed with the staff at "Oak Tree Elementary" and the very second I'm not? He doesn't have to stay. I decide how long I'm going to try to work it out and what my next step will be.

I don't know how to put it, but just that knowledge changes you. It changes school from being a prison to a place we'd like to go to learn and see friends. He doesn't have to go. And that makes all the difference.

22 April 2011

Yay, Emperor!

Emperor was undefeated in the K-4 division of the local chess league for the last six weeks, so he received this trophy! It is starting to look as though we are starting a collection. :)

21 April 2011

Happy Morning!

A poop on the potty?? YES, you can wear "dudderdare!" And get your picture taken! And have a big fuss made over you. And eat from the Polish pottery for breakfast. Mommy is so proud. :)

20 April 2011

Unique Fundraisers

I'm NOT going to go door-to-door selling dopey gift wrap and spice sets. The cookie dough the preschool sells is good, but is it $12 worth good? I just can't do that to my neighbours and friends. Mostly because then my neighbours and friends would get the idea that I need to pay them back by buying their dopey gift wrap and spice sets for scouts or whatever.

I'm the bad neighbour who says NO to every fundraiser known to Man. Too bad if you don't like it, but I just don't have time or energy to mess with forms, pay money, wait around and get stuff and distribute it and/or explain to my husband why I spent $42 on gift items. Oh, yeahhhh the Sally Foster gift wrap with the glitter on it was niiice stuff. Was it $8 nice for a little roll? Point taken.

"Most parents and school supporters will tell you that they would welcome an end to the annual sales of candy, candles, wrapping paper, magazines, cookie dough and other products they neither want nor need. For many parents, these fundraisers are a financial burden." Duh, this quote came from....

Wait for it...

A fundraiser for schools!

You knew it, didn't you? But this one is different and maybe a little scary. "Power for Schools" will give YOU the best residential rate through your electric company. Then the schools get a kickback, Mafia style. And boyo, with over 200,000 students, the schools in Houston are gonna get rich. Can you imagine, your electric company tangled up with the schools? Don't you get the superintendent all mad at you or the lights are gonna go out. And I mean all the way out.

Ok. Maybe paranoid me thinks it's just an odd idea and there is nothing mafia about it. I mean, they have the CUTE school and house drawings on their website, so it really has to be harmless. In fact, while I'm at it, I'll think of some other fundraising ideas for local schools:

1. Grocery cards. Get the best deals on groceries if you sign up for the program and pay a $20 annual fee. Kind of like Sam's Club, except non-members are paying $5 for a dozen eggs. You do not want to homeschool in this district, or if you do, you'd better be reallllyy supportive of public education. Just buy the card. Everyone wins!

2. Gas cards. The Richie Rich private schoolers and old ladies on pensions have lots of money to spend on a higher rate per gallon than YOU will get if you sign up with our program. The school gets money, and you save money, too. Everyone wins!

3. Physicians' offices. It's no secret that pink eye and the flu spreads like wildfire in a classroom setting. We contract with an unpopular physician who needs new patients and YOU pay only $20 a month fee for unlimited sick visits. We can offer it this cheaply because at this price, the doctor will be the only game and town and know immediately which classrooms have pink eye, lice or the flu as the "problem of the week." FAR less time is needed in evaluating symptoms once we have our index case documented. Everyone wins!

4. Book fair sales. Don't go to Barnes and Noble or browse on Amazon for exactly what you want. Attend our "literary fare" and purchase classics such as Captain Underpants or watered-down children's literature with easy to read type. Teachers can write up "wish lists" based on the mostly inane choices we offer or they can deal with whatever Central Office gives them that year (if anything). While you're there, your children will pester you to buy erasers that smell nice, silly novelties and small "educational" items. Everyone wins!

Oh, wait. Number 4 is actually being done in our local school...

19 April 2011

Touch the Rainbow!



Woodjie loves this video so much he will often ask for "tuss a waybo?" Rose thinks it is disgusting and scary and refuses to keep her finger on the screen. Enjoy!

17 April 2011

Crazy Comment Monday!

Context: commenting on what to do with the children over the summer.


"I rely on evangelicals for my kids' entertainment. See, since we are Catholic, evangelical Christians are always trying to convert my kids from the cult. They have lots of activities and camps, and they actually feel it's their calling to pick my kids up and take them to all these fun activities. As long as you don't mind your kids singing, "Jesus is My Friend" and bringing home felt and macaroni Jesus crafts, it's the way to go. Of course, at this point, my kids think Catholic church is real, and Protestant church is like play church."


Discuss.

15 April 2011

"Guest Posting?"


Was looking at my technorati ratings and whatnot recently, and they're in the tank. My husband says I need to write controversial stuff, get people really mad, and then watch the comments roll in.


Sweet.


But I'm not feeling that controversial right now. I was thinking maybe I need to let someone do a "guest post," because I see that done on other blogs and it works out pretty well. Then of course D got into all the crazy things he'd say if I gave him the floor. He'd also link back to his own leatherworking blog. Um, this guy kept getting readers after some weird searches for "leather wife" and whatnot were typed in, mmkay?


Of course that inspired him, because aside from some leatherworking gurus in Arkansas somewhere, no one followed his blog, so he did a whole post on how you will NOT find posts about the "leather wife" on his blog. At least not how these people were... thinking...


See my pic with one of D's creations? I am trying to do the tough guy look, but it doesn't work on a middle aged 340 pound lady. Oh, well. Patrick says the spiked bracelets are "Bowser." You know, Super Mario's Bowser.


Maybe I should let my alter ego blog sometime, but I'm afraid of some of the things she will say...

The Turnaround School

"The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she is treated." (Eliza Doolittle, My Fair Lady)


How would you like to go to this school? Behaviour "specialists" roam the halls with their walkie talkies and hand out citations to students who don't make it to class on time. Parents are volunteering at the school doors to smile at you... and hand you tickets if you're late. Yeahh, you're probably late because you're dragging your feet in the mornings and don't want to go. Helpfully, the school provides "motivational" posters on how to get to school ten minutes earlier. They must reason that the problem is in your poor planning, not your lack of enthusiasm.


The article is mostly about the poor, poor teachers, and how student perception of the teachers might have just changed after the school made national news last year. Um... Ya think? Nobody made you take this job, chickie. There's the door if you don't like it.


But the STUDENTS have no choice.


Notice that the students are not asked, but TOLD that they are to stay a half hour later, their lunch hour is cut, and they must attend dopey meetings in which they are to relate the high and low points of their day. This will allegedly get to the "root cause" of their bad behaviour. Really. I can't make stuff like this up... it's in the article. Oo, goody. Amateur psychology hour, too. Just what the elite high schools are doing. None of that robotics tournament stuff, ski club or lacrosse team. "High and low points" of the day discussion is soo much more interesting. Productive, too.


Oh, I would *hate* to have to earn my living in a place like that. I'm not saying that it's bad to want to stay in school, pass, move on to college or anything like that. At all. What I am saying is that this whole compulsive education system we have is wrongheaded and it makes for un-needed strife between people who ought have reasonably common goals. It's hard to respect the very hard work your teacher is doing for you if you view him as your jailer.


Sometimes caring for someone means that you let them make their own bad choices. I'm a mom of two teenage boys, and they are doing PLENTY of things that are bad choices. Even the difference between having a 13-year-old and having a 17-year-old is profound. I think I've gone from "MY kid will never do x, y, or z because I'M going to raise him RIGHT!" to, "If my kid does x, y, or z, he can count on zero support from me."


A 17-year-old is big enough to get away with all sorts of things, but that doesn't mean I have to be an enabler or expend my energy uselessly on the screaming hissy fit (remind me of that later, mmkay??). I will be the bad guy who just doesn't happen to share her computer or give rides in her car. I will just happen to be the parent who doesn't happen to remind children who want to be treated like adults about their appointments. It's hard to do. There are some doozie mistakes going on here. But at least one of my children is so close to adulthood that we're going to have to let him take the doozie adult consequences that go with his mistakes. All that to say, nagging, detention, and forced compliance DO NOT WORK long-term to change behaviour in older teens.


Most of us parents have figured that out, dear schools. Why can't you?

14 April 2011

Perspective on Testing

We can probably surmise that tests show something, and I'm starting to think that often, they show how well the test-ee can be bullied into answering as the teacher wishes.


Why am I saying such a mean thing? Well, our children have to graduate into the world sometime and it seems that in business, they bully all the time. Allow me to share a letter from "Very Bossley" Ford, Inc. that we've recently received after having work done on our vehicle:


Dear Mr. Realname,


On behalf of Very Bossley, I want to thank you for choosing us for your recent service visit. I appreciate your business and hope you will recommend me to your family and friends.


In a few weeks, Ford Motor Company may send you a survey asking your opinions about this visit with us. The most important score for me is question number 1, "How satisfied were you on your overall service experience at Very Bossley Ford?" This is my personal grade card and anything marked less than "Completely Satisfied", is a failing score from Ford.


I would appreciate your time in completing and returning the survey in the postage paid envelope supplied by Ford. The survey is very important to me and if for any reason you can not mark question number 1 "Completely Satisfied", please feel free to contact me at (number), or if I am unavailable contact Name Job Title at (number) and we will do our best to resolve your concerns. Remember, "Completely Satisfied" on question 1 and any other questions can be filled out differently to address your specific concerns.


Again, thank you for your input and taking time from your day in filling out this survey and your satisfaction is my highest priority to you.


Sincerely,

Name

Job Title


Okayyy. For the moment, we'll leave aside the minor lack of understanding when to capitalize, and improper use of commas, quotation marks and that sort of thing. But if YOU were a honcho at Ford Motor Company, and suddenly nearly every customer from Very Bossley Ford, Inc. returned a survey stating that he was "completely satisfied" in every way, would you perhaps wonder at the accuracy of the tests? Would you be "completely satisfied" with your branch managers if you found them to be sending letters directly to customers, coaching them as to how to answer your tests?


Large companies like this can spend quite a bit of money gathering information like this and it honestly bothers me that Very Bossley is trying to undercut that process. Notice that the concern really isn't about the customer, either. He doesn't really care how you answer any other question - just pweeease don't affect his good standing with the corporate office! I don't like the real-life implications running through my head right now...

13 April 2011

Shopping With Elf and Emperor

I think the things they decided to buy at the convention reflected their interests and personalities. Elf selected a muffin tin very much like the cookie tray you see here near Emperor's apple baker. Stainless steel. Niiice. Threw out all my old gummed-up nasty stuff from Evil Mart and am happily using these as well as my new pizza pan. D says you could just about hang it on the wall, but I know it will get dinged and cut and scratched like anything else in our home. It won't leach into our food, tho'. That alone makes it, as Woodjie would say, "You-ee-full."


Emperor scouted all over the convention hall. You would think that with a zillion homeschoolers about, that there would be better chess books for sale. He was miffed that the nicest one with illustrations didn't get any more in-depth than explaining castling. He bought a magnetic chess set so he could play chess in the car (two hours each day on the computer is not enough) and some chess trinkets... the sort that he would be able to hang on his backpack... if he ever USED a backpack. Nice stuff, though. Elf had enough money for a little knight that is on his messenger bag for school next year.


Emperor was determined to get a set of history books from either My Father's World or Sonlight this year. His prime mission was to see which books were too soft, whether they were interesting, and "stuff about Rome."


First... the My Father's World booth. I thought from the catalogue that this set would actually be the best fit for his age and reading ability. Maybe just not the chess book that comes with it. It seems to be geared to a slightly younger set than the Sonlight core that includes Ancient Rome. He liked the books well enough, but NOT the worksheets. They were terrible, he told me. Umm... that's because they covered them in plastic sheeting so they wouldn't tear while everyone is looking through them? You can't just base your dislike for the program on that... Well, that and the disappointment in the chess book seemed to sour him a bit.


On to the Sonlight booth. The consultant tried to steer him to a younger core package that did NOT include Rome. Emperor was displeased. He came for Rome. Also displeasing was the fact that several of the books were absolutely identical in both programs. I don't know why he hadn't figured that out before, but perhaps the extreme amount of STUFF in the Sonlight curriculum especially blinded him to that fact.


I rather liked the look of the books in their core, though doggone it, they didn't bring them all! Emperor wanted to check for softness. The consultant musta thought we were crazy and kept showing us the PICTURES of the books on the back cover. In all honesty some of the Sonlight selections were a probably bit above him. Not a big deal if, as the consultant told us, we could stretch a core to last two years if we wanted. (Why not, and supplement with library stuff? Plus the fact that almost no teacher ever gets through everything, and every activity, in one school year.)


I was thinking this was a great idea, but I could tell Emperor wasn't happy. That's ok. He has lots of time to stroll around the convention hall and think about what to get. For that matter, we could always order something later if he couldn't decide that day. Eventually what he decided on was something in both his top contenders' packages: Story of the World. But I had no idea it had its own activity workbook and test book as well as they are not included as any sort of set I'd encountered before. Of course Emperor loved it for the same reasons I was hoping he'd buy a boxed curriculum set: lots of fun hands-on activities. Which of course means more teacher work. I will need to plan ahead... which... I am not that skilled at doing. Guess I have to give it my best shot, because I DID promise him he could pick out that one subject.


Emperor also wanted to buy Augustus Caesar's World and Famous Men of Rome from Memoria Press. The latter may be a bit ambitious on his part, but he says he can do anything. He can learn anything. By the way, he is starting to consistently beat the 1000-rated computer and most of the children who play online at chesskid. I signed up "HappyElfHomeschool" on chess.com and Emperor is now soundly getting his butt trounced by 1400-rated players. He was able to get his rating up to 1340, though. For a minute. I should have taken a picture. Honestly, the chess.com players are mostly adults and he's gonna feel the pain. Yowch.

Super Mario Cupcakes!


G is now 16 years old, and the proud owner of Pokemon Black. We made cupcakes for the occasion using Elf's very own new muffin tin. He bought it at the homeschooling convention last weekend. We tried this idea for Super Mario mushrooms, but it IS pretty hard to decorate cupcakes with just one working arm. G had plenty of pizza on his special day, and will have his cast removed in a week and a half.

11 April 2011

What??

Um, this news story is a "debate about the best way to promote healthy eating for children??"


No. It isn't. This news story is about GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY KID AND MY WALLET. As in, I'm the parent. As in, if I want to send my kid 5 Hershey bars and a soda with his lunch every now and then, it's none of your dang business. I don't care about "promoting healthy eating for children." Although I'm certainly not against healthy eating... I mean, I'm for "good toileting habits" as well, but aside from my autistic child who has NEVER been able to poop on the potty and needs help with diapers, I'm going to say that my kids' wiping habits are none of your dang business, either.


And I'll tell you something. Bad potty hygiene is a LOT more dangerous than not eating your vegetables for a meal or two.


And whatever happened to a "free and appropriate education" for all children? If I'm forced to buy the school lunch, that isn't "free." You might argue that I would have to provide a meal for my kid... and I'd agree. If that meal contains five Hershey bars and the other kids at school get all jealous, tough crap.


Actually as it is, I have an underweight child I'm constantly trying to feed extra. It's true. The school nurse is kind enough to keep the snacks I send each month on hand so my child can have extra food during the day and not lose weight.


Has it ever occurred to ANYONE making these policies that there are underweight children as well? Or children with food allergies? I have a child allergic to milk and eggs. Is he restricted to eating the salad and then throwing the milk that comes with the lunch into the trash?


When are people going to stand up to stuff like this? I mean really stand up. None of this namby-pamby "I promise to bring healthy lunches to school" stuff. How about "my lunch, my body, my choice?" :P Blehh.


Now, just as an aside, I do sympathise with the fact that it can be hard to limit children's food intake. I got a shock at the ER the other day; Elf is 104 pounds. He will not be "dieting," but in the future, I won't be feeding him five sandwiches like his underweight brother gets, either. Common sense.

09 April 2011

Sunday Selections - The Elf


Took a tumble from the plastic baby cars we keep in the backyard, resulting in two broken bones in his wrist. Poor Elf. For more (hopefully more cheerful) Sunday Selections, visit Kim's blog.

Curriculum '11 - '12: Reading and Writing

D has found BJU Press Reading Level 6 at the thrift store in years past. Here is a link to the textbook; click the book for sample pages. All I did was buy a workbook. I'm not even sure that that is necessary. We'll also be doing exercises from the Reading Detective workbook.



Using a book from Total Language Plus, we'll be writing and learning more about Tolkien's book, The Hobbit. I've never used this company's resources before, so this will be new for us. It should take the average student about 12 weeks to complete the book, is what I've been told. Emperor has tremendous, tremendous difficulty writing. At least, I imagine him to be quite behind, but I have nothing to measure him against.


Another item I got - which I cannot WAIT to use, but think perhaps is best to do last, is the Lord of the Rings study from Veritas Press. LOTR is a more involved, complicated book and I should rather work through some of the easier items on our list first. And yes, Elf read LOTR to us through this school year, but Emperor has not read it yet for himself.

08 April 2011

Princess Hairdo


I used the "baby hair" tutorial on this website and used an old sock in her hair. She doesn't have enough hair or patience to look like a "manga" character, though. Princess will have to do. I also didn't have the patience to wind up bits of her hair everywhere, so I popped a scrunchie on it for a bit of foo-foo flair. Rose is running around everywhere grabbing her "donut" bun and asking everyone to "Ook a me shirt!" Pretty.

06 April 2011

Choosing a History Curriculum

I have NO idea what it's going to be. I'm letting a nine-year-old decide. Yes. A nine-year-old will be perusing your booths at the curriculum fair, O fair sellers of goods. And here are some of the things that would make your stuff stand out:


1. Emperor wants to study Ancient Rome and of course most specifically, Augustus Caesar. If your stuff is about Iceland, he doesn't want to read about that again. Aside from the volcano thing, he thought Iceland to be odd and sort of boring when we studied it. Ok. Except for the Journey to the Center of the Earth part. Was that a true story? He wants to know.


2. I don't know if you can swing this, but another biggie on his agenda is that he would like the books not to feel SOFT. He hates soft things. I don't go into this a lot on the blog, but often he must get a towel (NOT SOFT COTTON! AAarg!) or pull his sleeves over his hands to hold a book open. The softness drives him crazy. The kid screams about the softness of the books so badly that I wish there were a book-holder-opener. Even though it would be a space-hogging piece of junk, I'd probably buy one if you had one for sale. But barring that, glossy pages would help deter the horrid scratchy SOFT feeling he hates. Yeah. I know I'll be out some money on that. But scream-free days are worth it. So no newsprint-y type books. Please.


3. He wants pictures. There is no stinkin' point to studying about other cultures if there aren't good pictures. As in, photographs. Some of the artwork in certain books is "inrealistic."


4. It probably (siiigh) has to be expensive. He doesn't think the $20 fill-in-the-oval workbook Mom thought would be easier to get through will do. But thank you for asking.


5. He would like an entire truckload of books in a package-y deal. His mom has discussed the concept of, "but that would be more work for you to get through in a year," but he doesn't seem to care. He seems to think that more time spent in a "not-boring way is better than just getting it done and over with."


6. Even the box of workbooks - you know the ones, ten to a school year, same cover on all - even those didn't appeal to him. Each of the books must be DIFFERENT. Have a different cover and maybe even a different size.


7. And no writing. Writing is no fun. Please don't make him write anything, ever again. (Hmm... been awhile since the homeschoolers' blogs have been updated...)

04 April 2011

Snug Blanket of Homeschooling? Damn Straight.




This superintendent is FED UP with bad treatment and decreased funding for public education. He IS, however, content with leaving paddling on the books in his district. You won't see a demonstration against that! I'm sure the teachers realllly care, though. They've lobbied against corporal punishment in the schools soooo consistently. I mean, the NEA website is just riddled with calls to activism against -


What? It isn't? Ohh, my. How surprising. Just look at me jumping out of my seat with amazement. (whoo.) I'm so amazed. Here I thought so many of the teachers were concerned about homeschoolers because they, you know, might be abused at home. Locked in a closet or something. You know... like my son was at school. That's the reason we started homeschooling. Ohh the irony.


Parents like me enjoy wrapping our children in the "snug blanket of homeschooling." Watch the video. He said it. I imagine that he means we overcoddle our children and protect them from the normal, everyday things like the homelessness, poverty and drug addiction that HE is dealing with in the public school. If I've overcoddled my children, I figure the snug blanket will be removed soon enough. The guy's speaking from TEXAS, though. Nobody wants a hot, fluffy blanket in 90-degree weather! What kind of analogy is that?


Not to mention the insults this superintendent throws at his own schoolchildren. He has the gall to get up in front of God and everybody and say right off the bat that public school students are NEVER really going to be as shiny and new or "scrubbed clean" like privately-schooled kids or homeschoolers. Yeah. I'd be danged insulted if I had a child in this guy's district. My kids are clean enough and I resent the implication that just because I'm lower class, that I need to learn what this "soap" thing is. Hey. My kids' clothes are stained and threadbare because they are old and we can't afford new ones every week. But they are *clean.* Maybe I spent my money BUYING BOOKS for my kids like the private school kids he's busy deriding.


But... you have to admit, it IS nice of him to be a fighter and march into that school building every day, all bleeding and bruised (did you hear that insane talk?? He really said that!) **sniff** but those valiant teachers... they're not gonna give up on the kids. You can cut this fella's pay back to minimum wage and he'd still be there fighting. Oh, yeahhh. Know why? Either the benefits are dang good, or he's lying as some sort of stage gimmick for emotional effect during his speech. I'm thinking lying, but his benefits are still probably better than mine. See, but I don't feel his money needs to be redistributed to my pocket "for the kids," though. That's the difference between us.


03 April 2011

Too Fat?

How do you tell if your baby or young child is overweight? The answer is, of course, that the doctor is to plot the baby's height and weight onto a NATIONALLY NORMED chart.


I know all y'all parents are going YAY! Why should I have to wait until my child is going to school to have him tested and compared to his peers? So here's how we're going to play the "ostracise the fat kid" game: any weight over the 85th percentile means your child is too fat. Don't eeeven think that if the doctor doesn't say anything about your kid being too fat, that it's ok for your kid to be too fat. By which we mean, anything over the 85th percentile. The percentile tells you your kid is fat. I swear I am not making this up.


Now, I know what you are probably thinking. You're probably thinking that if one were to find 100 American children to chart statistically, that 15 of them would be unlucky enough to be in the 85th percentile or above. Let me just tell you, you need to STOP that thinking. The lady in the video is trying to sell you a book and you need to listen up. Anything over the 85th percentile means the kid is FAT, do you hear me? You just nevermind that Americans are racially diverse, that God made people in all colours and sizes, and that a Chinese-American baby is going to weigh farrr less at birth than my average 10 pound German-Irish American baby. The chart just says *my* babies are fat. Smaller babies simply must be "failure to thrive," not "smaller babies." The chart is what is going to tell us these things. Do not use "common sense." The chart is more scientific. It's nationally-normed!


Oh! But it doesn't go to 100 or have a maximum. All of my children - except for my extremely stunted-in-growth-50th percentile ELF - are well above the recommended but very small height. I'm sure something must be done.


I'm not sure (specifically) what to think about the 135 pound toddler in the story. If the kid is eating a few bowls of rice extra, it wouldn't bother me. Or a cabinet full of cookies. Or five bars of chocolate and a milkshake. What would bother me? Finding a car seat for him. Having to teach him to sit on any kid that makes fun of him. Stuff like that. But I don't know why the story about this child from China is in the news. This is news... why?


And do I realllly need to hear about some guy who doesn't feel like getting out of his chair? Um, the guy doesn't want to get out of the chair... the girlfriend is ok feeding him... leave the guy alone. It's his life! Can you blame him for not wanting to go to the doctor? I sure can't! Do you know how embarrassing it is to go to the doctor when you're overweight?? Most of us, seriously, would pretty much rather die.


But if I found MAGGOTS in my chair? I'd cardio all the way to the shower and then go shopping for a new one in my Lark (tm). Just because I'm sedentary doesn't mean my children can study the life cycle of the housefly in my living room.

02 April 2011

Woodjie Update

"Ot dat, Mommy? See, Mommy, see? Ot dat?" Woodjie is constantly asking for the names of objects. He seems to have trouble remembering them, but hey! He knows everything has a name. He can ask for his fave kind of cereal and many other foods. Taking him places is still very hard, and he still hasn't figured out how to use the potty to poop despite much teaching.

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But he is doing very well in preschool. His teacher is starting to work on a few sight words and he will be joining a regular class soon part-time with his aide. Not sure how that works if one is still pooping in a diaper, but they seem to think he has enough functional behaviour and language that he can leave the autism classroom (ok, they call it the "communication" classroom, but whatevs) for a little bit each day.

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He has forgotten how to write all his letters, but he can now say, "I want... have it. Me." So he's getting a lot of stuff that he wants... have it... him. I am reading a book about how to potty train people on the autism spectrum and have been charting the time of day he poops and eats and all that. Maybe it will help to get some sort of schedule. He just urinates when I take him and doesn't ask, so technically he isn't urine-trained either. Some of the things in the book about the child remembering to go potty, asking, getting to the toilet and doing everything himself are still a verrry long way away. But I can save a little work for myself by teaching him to put on his pants after his bath. If I line it up for him, he can usually do this. Someday he will pick out his own clothes and dress himself! Yes, he will. :)

01 April 2011

Are You Smarter Than a Third Grader?

Apparently I am *not.* There is nothing like a little work on the chesskid.com website to put me in my proper place. And that is... with a chesskid rating of about 340... with the average third grade tournament player. Yay me. And pictured here is Emperor, who would have been in third grade this year... after beating the computer. Really. It isn't exactly Deep Blue, but *is* set for over 900. How did he do that? I am not sure what his real rating is but I imagine he is likely a solid Class G. He loves to play real opponents online and if you're ever on chesskid, challenge "A-Gust-of-Wind" to a game sometime. He says different players have different "personalities" by the way they play. He can play the computer but never "know" the computer, is how he puts it. Okayyy. He was actually able to play with one of the fellows who make the chesskid videos once! He was SO excited to be able to play him; it was like a rock star landed in our living room. Now that I have bought the premium chesskid membership, he's on for about two hours a day. He is not obsessed. He just needs to study TACTICS. There is a tournament at the end of this month, you know.

People Are Stupd.

Stupd, I tell you. In fact, everyone who has a different opinion than me seems a little stupd sometimes. Check out this editorial on the godless Japanese and the "tidal wave," because notice HE prefers the "American" version of the word. Myyy. Then of course, the writer launches into the fact that a good lack of real coverage of the extreme suffering and loss of life in Japan hindered charitable giving. We are too focused on other things. Ok, I agree with that last part.


I'm shocked not so much that someone wrote such things, but that someone with money printed it. The link is to a conglomerate of small-town papers. You know... the only paper in town type of thing. Read by thousands. I strongly believe in freedom of speech and of the press, but it makes me sad to see it used like that. I should save stuff like this for "Crazy Comment Monday," but sometimes things are past the point where they give you a good chuckle because of the insaneness of it all... Nevermind. I will publish this even though it is Friday. My blog, my rules. :)

Bringing Garbage Home

Some people up the street were throwing this table away. It was in pretty bad shape and one of the legs was off. I've glued the leg back...